DEFINITION: Hoover is a slang term that means "getting manipulated back into a relationship against your will by highly abusive means such as threats of suicide or self-harm, threats of harm to others or property, or threats of false criminal accusations. It is a type of blackmail. The term should only be used in situations where a person would feel highly abusive pressures to return against their will. The term should only be used in places where "trying to blackmail me back into the relationship" could be substituted in the sentence.
ALTERNATES: "Recycling", "Break-up /make-up", "Recycle"
MISUSE: The term hoover is not used to describe the inability to disengage - a person going back or being tempted to go back into a relationship because their resolve is weak. The term is also not used to describe inappropraite post relationship boundary breaking such as expressions of anger, insults or requests for favors. Hoover should not be used to describe ordinary post relationship communications such as coordinating property returns, or requests for information. Hoover should not be used to describe incidental contact or news (birthday wishes, marriage/sickness/death information) or anything that does not fit the definition above.
Slang term - this term has no psychiatric meaning and is not found it in any professional mental health literature.
See also post relationship trauma.