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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means generating the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tension with your ex.
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Subject Started by Replies Views Last post
WHO SHOULD POST ON THIS BOARD? BPDFamily 1 23921 Last post December 29, 2014, 01:27:39 PM
by livednlearned
CO-PARENTING: Doing what’s best for the kids BPDFamily 6 3005 Last post January 04, 2011, 11:14:41 PM
by BPDFamily
Step mom of BPD 19 Jenipher 0 12 Last post Yesterday at 10:16:52 PM
by Jenipher
Can't read D on her birthday « 1 2  All » Ulysses 12 176 Last post Yesterday at 08:32:09 PM
by Turkish
Sort of depressing after a year of good cheer.... ennie 2 58 Last post Yesterday at 06:20:25 PM
by Ulysses
Ex is using 4 year old to find out information on me razemarie 6 164 Last post Yesterday at 02:53:24 PM
by razemarie
Strained relationship with daughter not getting better newlifeBPDfree 2 35 Last post Yesterday at 11:49:54 AM
by newlifeBPDfree
kids won't respond to my texts/calls « 1 2  All » truthbeknown 13 206 Last post Yesterday at 08:47:09 AM
by truthbeknown
9 months post breakup BrokenFamily 0 13 Last post Yesterday at 08:12:14 AM
by BrokenFamily
How To Validate This? Turkish 6 142 Last post August 02, 2015, 11:13:24 PM
by Turkish
Im in the weeds pretty deep « 1 2  All » Eco 14 279 Last post August 01, 2015, 01:02:15 AM
by Eco
SD10s frustration Thunderstruck 8 183 Last post July 30, 2015, 01:02:18 PM
by Thunderstruck
Can exH delegate co-parenting to new (almost)stepmom? « 1 2  All » Ulysses 18 390 Last post July 30, 2015, 12:49:16 AM
by Ulysses
The pattern continues Eco 0 42 Last post July 29, 2015, 11:37:46 PM
by Eco
Hodgepodge Turkish 2 125 Last post July 29, 2015, 11:35:44 PM
by Turkish
Co-parenting with a BPD who keeps trying to "win". Yayalupi 1 74 Last post July 29, 2015, 10:37:01 PM
by Turkish
High Conflict Divorce/Parental Alienation in the News in Detroit « 1 2  All » Panda39 15 338 Last post July 27, 2015, 12:19:48 PM
by ForeverDad
Should I give in to reduce summer week with D7 for new uBPDxw family plans? forestfortrees 5 138 Last post July 27, 2015, 11:14:35 AM
by ForeverDad
Out of state « 1 2  All » Eco 15 367 Last post July 27, 2015, 09:26:41 AM
by ForeverDad
Mother losing custody, what to expect? LongRoad 8 384 Last post July 27, 2015, 08:12:08 AM
by ForeverDad
Well she did it again « 1 2 3 4  All » Panda39 39 1204 Last post July 23, 2015, 02:52:14 PM
by ForeverDad
Co-parenting with someone that can't admit to anything. « 1 2  All » Nikhed15 15 256 Last post July 23, 2015, 11:04:26 AM
by Sunfl0wer
Mom poised to pull kids out of school « 1 2 3 4  All » kells76 37 682 Last post July 22, 2015, 05:48:46 PM
by kells76
NPD ex playing mind games with children lucylou 4 168 Last post July 18, 2015, 01:30:47 PM
by momtara
Using SET to find out where my daughter is? « 1 2  All » ambivalentmom 15 249 Last post July 17, 2015, 11:17:26 AM
by Skip
xuBPDw is threatening/guilting over Adult Children ugghh 6 181 Last post July 16, 2015, 03:18:29 PM
by PinkieV
SD9's idea of "conflict resolution" & source of sibling conflict « 1 2  All » kells76 13 266 Last post July 16, 2015, 03:03:03 PM
by ForeverDad
New babysitter Eco 4 108 Last post July 16, 2015, 01:02:49 PM
by Eco
Is anyone seeing a BPD-skilled therapist for themselves? scraps66 8 115 Last post July 16, 2015, 08:26:29 AM
by david
odd statement Eco 7 179 Last post July 15, 2015, 06:54:03 PM
by Eco
permission to move rarsweet 6 184 Last post July 15, 2015, 09:19:50 AM
by rarsweet
vacation#2 Eco 9 217 Last post July 14, 2015, 11:06:14 PM
by Eco
What to do? « 1 2 3  All » bravhart1 22 637 Last post July 14, 2015, 01:24:03 PM
by bravhart1
My ex is a narcissist with BPD: how do I help my children? knoxknox3 2 128 Last post July 14, 2015, 07:17:12 AM
by david
Playing the Diagnosis Game, I Think scraps66 6 157 Last post July 14, 2015, 12:42:14 AM
by Turkish
Need advice re sleeping arrangements at ex BPD/NPDs partners house lucylou 8 265 Last post July 12, 2015, 08:36:50 AM
by livednlearned
Summer daycare Thunderstruck 5 152 Last post July 10, 2015, 11:44:56 AM
by ambivalentmom
Kids being brianwash into NOT going to or misbehaving in school? trying2coparent 8 196 Last post July 09, 2015, 10:53:56 AM
by trying2coparent
Intro: Possible BPDxh, D12, and Maybe Lucky ambivalentmom 4 123 Last post July 09, 2015, 10:20:55 AM
by livednlearned
New here Carebear11 2 91 Last post July 09, 2015, 09:47:48 AM
by livednlearned
just an introduction pipefish 3 159 Last post July 08, 2015, 08:52:22 PM
by livednlearned
Should exBPDh come on holiday with us? « 1 2  All » Cmjo 11 232 Last post July 08, 2015, 02:21:32 PM
by Cmjo
BPDXw, adult children wanting no contact Forestaken 7 214 Last post July 07, 2015, 10:48:58 AM
by Forestaken
Your Child's Diary and BP Parent scraps66 2 89 Last post July 07, 2015, 09:50:20 AM
by Thunderstruck
fatigue Eco 6 219 Last post July 06, 2015, 11:38:52 AM
by whirlpoollife
Twilight zone Eco 7 252 Last post July 04, 2015, 03:20:41 PM
by Eco
ROFR and not Being the Dad scraps66 3 141 Last post July 02, 2015, 06:16:18 PM
by Eco
self awareness? rarsweet 2 95 Last post July 02, 2015, 07:26:27 AM
by rarsweet
Troubling idea from my nine year old half-life 3 223 Last post July 01, 2015, 04:29:47 PM
by half-life
Movie: Inside Out half-life 6 306 Last post July 01, 2015, 01:42:28 PM
by Forestaken
Help Navigating A Visit from the Kids Bio Mom Nope 6 156 Last post July 01, 2015, 12:21:58 PM
by PinkieV
Need help - BPDw wants to accompany son to see grandparents takingandsending 3 117 Last post July 01, 2015, 11:31:09 AM
by takingandsending
Vacation « 1 2  All » Eco 13 300 Last post June 30, 2015, 11:50:44 PM
by Eco
My ex is losing it Eco 3 188 Last post June 30, 2015, 11:43:59 PM
by Eco
When does a child become painted black? takingandsending 4 242 Last post June 27, 2015, 11:31:18 AM
by livednlearned
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