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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means generating the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tension with your ex.
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Subject Started by Replies Views Last post
WHO SHOULD POST ON THIS BOARD? BPDFamily 1 27555 Last post December 29, 2014, 01:27:39 PM
by livednlearned
CO-PARENTING: Doing what’s best for the kids BPDFamily 6 8560 Last post January 04, 2011, 11:14:41 PM
by BPDFamily
Just curious why my son's mother would say these things. JerryRG 8 241 Last post September 27, 2016, 09:48:54 PM
by JerryRG
boyfriend's borderline adult children losttranslation 1 60 Last post September 27, 2016, 01:08:35 PM
by Turkish
Estrangement / alienation Dutched 0 33 Last post September 26, 2016, 04:19:22 PM
by Dutched
Stay-cation vs mountains vacation « 1 2 3  All » ForeverDad 26 1306 Last post September 26, 2016, 03:37:52 PM
by Nope
I can't co-parent with him Dontknow88 3 171 Last post September 26, 2016, 02:12:53 PM
by ForeverDad
non DH and I breaking up? Still Parenting... ennie 4 96 Last post September 26, 2016, 12:11:41 PM
by Thunderstruck
When older kids start to realize...the fallout...what to expect? sanemom 6 344 Last post September 22, 2016, 12:00:35 AM
by ennie
What are the secrets of co-parenting with a borderline? « 1 2  All » Moselle 11 449 Last post September 21, 2016, 11:46:26 PM
by ennie
Besides my son I regret... Dontknow88 9 242 Last post September 20, 2016, 03:30:24 PM
by ForeverDad
Alienation Webinar September 19 + 20 Nope 1 110 Last post September 20, 2016, 02:28:43 PM
by ForeverDad
am I being guilt tripped? bus boy 2 103 Last post September 19, 2016, 06:03:38 AM
by bus boy
Is deliberately trying to hurt me? Dontknow88 8 201 Last post September 14, 2016, 11:21:24 AM
by Dontknow88
Introducing myself Raphaël 1 120 Last post September 11, 2016, 11:51:37 AM
by Mutt
Not speaking to ex Rewards2 5 225 Last post September 08, 2016, 05:19:20 PM
by david
The Projection Game Thunderstruck 7 278 Last post September 07, 2016, 11:59:19 PM
by catclaw
freaking out stuck in a small room together honeysuckle 3 301 Last post September 06, 2016, 12:56:19 PM
by Bright Day Mom
It gets better ShaSha 2 142 Last post September 06, 2016, 11:05:54 AM
by sanemom
ex wife has bpd I think mccarus 1 104 Last post September 05, 2016, 07:29:26 PM
by Naughty Nibbler
how deep can the bpd parent manuplate? bus boy 3 298 Last post September 01, 2016, 03:27:12 PM
by bus boy
Stopping the cycle of abuse bus boy 1 166 Last post September 01, 2016, 09:14:19 AM
by OutOfEgypt
Something concerning about my son JerryRG 3 172 Last post August 31, 2016, 10:36:29 PM
by Kowalski
It never ends JerryRG 2 154 Last post August 30, 2016, 09:33:53 PM
by JerryRG
What will the judge say? « 1 2  All » bus boy 12 574 Last post August 29, 2016, 07:06:53 PM
by david
Contradictory behavior KaishaMikasa 4 231 Last post August 27, 2016, 11:31:11 PM
by KaishaMikasa
Something has changed with son...we'll work through it... Kowalski 2 216 Last post August 26, 2016, 02:57:04 PM
by Kowalski
School manipulation catclaw 4 213 Last post August 25, 2016, 11:13:09 AM
by Thunderstruck
Back to school Thunderstruck 4 181 Last post August 25, 2016, 11:06:15 AM
by david
NPD/ BPD make bad parents? bus boy 5 226 Last post August 25, 2016, 08:24:29 AM
by Panda39
Weekly Child Report Communication Experiences? « 1 2  All » Kowalski 19 578 Last post August 24, 2016, 06:33:29 PM
by Kowalski
Telling my ex to stick to our son is causing resistance « 1 2  All » JerryRG 11 410 Last post August 24, 2016, 08:53:39 AM
by david
Soon to be divorced anonymous_in_NV 5 360 Last post August 23, 2016, 08:28:51 PM
by Panda39
Court on Tuesday, she burnt the past 9 months. So strange. bus boy 5 302 Last post August 23, 2016, 05:38:04 PM
by bus boy
Worried about my childs future SleepingBeauty17 4 519 Last post August 22, 2016, 02:11:21 AM
by caralynbuehner
Changing Schools For Son Turkish 3 227 Last post August 21, 2016, 01:54:23 PM
by Naughty Nibbler
I must never forget the horror JerryRG 9 300 Last post August 21, 2016, 12:04:40 PM
by FallBack!Monster
Her 40 year old bf texts my 9 year old son bus boy 7 283 Last post August 19, 2016, 04:57:20 AM
by bus boy
Daddy’s home: Why I let my ex live with us on weekends half-life 5 314 Last post August 18, 2016, 04:09:14 PM
by ForeverDad
Trauma Focused CBT Recommended For Us « 1 2  All » Turkish 16 1252 Last post August 18, 2016, 12:55:45 AM
by Turkish
Help with Boundaries anonymous_in_NV 3 153 Last post August 17, 2016, 11:37:47 AM
by anonymous_in_NV
How to explain separate birthday parties to children BonusMom 3 179 Last post August 17, 2016, 08:53:07 AM
by Thunderstruck
It's hard & im over it Dontknow88 0 127 Last post August 15, 2016, 12:57:01 PM
by Dontknow88
She had changed gears. bus boy 2 269 Last post August 14, 2016, 07:15:49 PM
by Mutt
Co-parenting vs. Cooperative Parenting vs. Parallel Parenting « 1 2  All » Kowalski 13 450 Last post August 12, 2016, 04:18:11 PM
by Kowalski
Preview Day for Middle School « 1 2  All » Thunderstruck 12 603 Last post August 12, 2016, 01:46:38 PM
by Thunderstruck
Mother is trying to manipulate JerryRG 5 195 Last post August 11, 2016, 10:44:12 PM
by JerryRG
Telling my ex to stick to our son is causing resistance JerryRG 3 139 Last post August 11, 2016, 09:09:25 PM
by thisagain
When they are completely mad JerryRG 2 188 Last post August 10, 2016, 01:58:53 AM
by enlighten me
My attitude is crumbling « 1 2  All » JerryRG 10 316 Last post August 08, 2016, 05:20:32 AM
by married21years
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