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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means generating the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tension with your ex.
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Subject Started by Replies Views Last post
Therapy for Step-son A Step-Mom 5 477 Last post December 21, 2012, 02:04:39 PM
by A Step-Mom
Worried about step son's safety... « 1 2  All » A Step-Mom 13 772 Last post December 18, 2012, 02:23:07 PM
by DreamGirl
Apology to former stepdaughter? aandersonco 4 585 Last post November 18, 2008, 04:03:35 PM
by aandersonco
Four letter word for a BPD with a Facebook account Abigayle 3 407 Last post September 17, 2013, 11:09:31 PM
by Forward2free
Is BPD hereditary? « 1 2  All » ableft 19 3425 Last post April 18, 2006, 09:04:08 AM
by Peace4us
Wondering how to handle effect of dh w/BPD Aboutme2011 1 364 Last post June 04, 2011, 09:13:24 AM
by Matt
Had a talk with my SS today Aboutme2011 0 266 Last post June 25, 2011, 11:03:53 PM
by Aboutme2011
The issues my stepson is dealing with Aboutme2011 1 367 Last post June 04, 2011, 09:04:01 AM
by Matt
Need help telling SS11's mom about how his BPD dad has treated us Aboutme2011 2 312 Last post August 03, 2011, 08:57:59 PM
by Aboutme2011
Thoughts about the kids Aboutme2011 9 758 Last post June 28, 2011, 09:05:14 PM
by Aboutme2011
Is your pwBPD abusive toward their own kids? « 1 2  All » Aboutme2011 13 1295 Last post June 24, 2011, 06:17:24 PM
by Soontobenidan
First counseling session tomorrow Aboutme2011 0 256 Last post July 04, 2011, 10:34:22 PM
by Aboutme2011
Things that drive me nuts Aboutme2011 5 656 Last post July 13, 2011, 08:45:54 PM
by Matt
Where I get lost Aboutme2011 3 433 Last post June 23, 2011, 09:35:22 PM
by Aboutme2011
the binds of shame... abundant peace 6 487 Last post May 31, 2008, 12:33:49 AM
by happygirl
first official post abundant peace 6 501 Last post April 17, 2008, 09:39:01 AM
by Rose
projection and parental alienation « 1 2  All » abundant peace 11 790 Last post April 18, 2008, 06:57:40 PM
by abundant peace
secondary non sleeping problems abundant peace 6 441 Last post April 22, 2008, 01:53:59 PM
by sonnyboy
Really? agast84 0 312 Last post June 09, 2011, 02:32:42 PM
by agast84
Any tips on suporting kids not living with you? agast84 5 479 Last post December 18, 2010, 01:25:44 PM
by agast84
BPD going to therapy with the kids agerard 0 274 Last post August 26, 2008, 02:37:32 PM
by agerard
Can you tell child (teenager) the mom has BPD? « 1 2  All » agoodview 15 2771 Last post March 19, 2011, 07:46:46 PM
by Derrah
UxBPDw drugging daughter to enforce bedtime - with Dr's blessing aikiboy2k 8 1401 Last post January 19, 2010, 02:20:47 AM
by Matt
Advice about moving away for career plz. aikiboy2k 3 360 Last post January 13, 2009, 12:14:48 PM
by aikiboy2k
how do you justify staying w/ an abusive man « 1 2  All » ajohnson 12 1462 Last post April 16, 2006, 10:39:52 AM
by ableft
Denying Visitation... Damned if you Do, Damned if you Don't AKnightInTheMaking 3 488 Last post August 06, 2009, 10:49:12 AM
by oneflewover
Mediation BS AKnightInTheMaking 3 364 Last post December 13, 2007, 10:23:02 PM
by AKnightInTheMaking
Help - Need info for a Motion to Hold in Contept of Court « 1 2  All » AKnightInTheMaking 10 848 Last post October 11, 2007, 06:24:12 AM
by funefarm4
Psycho calling the daycare « 1 2  All » AKnightInTheMaking 10 672 Last post May 04, 2008, 04:30:36 PM
by laurena82
She wants me to fill out a monthly info form... « 1 2  All » AKnightInTheMaking 18 1148 Last post December 11, 2007, 02:55:27 PM
by laurena82
OK... this is a new one... ever have your childs luggage held hostage? « 1 2 3 4  All » AKnightInTheMaking 36 1804 Last post February 10, 2008, 08:04:53 PM
by LEO
Something approaching "normal"?... hell, even "responsible" will do AKnightInTheMaking 9 881 Last post June 14, 2009, 12:45:22 PM
by keepmesane
Pandora's Box? - Weekly Phone Calls from uBPexw Being Mediated on... « 1 2  All » AKnightInTheMaking 13 773 Last post October 19, 2007, 02:58:34 PM
by ForeverDad
Court next month... Alectay2 4 325 Last post February 19, 2008, 01:54:07 PM
by Mr. M
Manipulation with the children « 1 2 3 4  All » alembic 33 3073 Last post July 22, 2013, 11:50:33 PM
by DivDad
Communicating with BPDxw mother... alf 4 576 Last post May 28, 2010, 01:34:19 PM
by alf
Ex & Mother will only rage on phone not mail or e-mail ... Ideas? « 1 2  All » alf 16 906 Last post October 03, 2007, 01:55:04 PM
by laurena82
Need Help... I am intimidated by my kids --frozen-- « 1 2  All » alf 18 2314 Last post October 28, 2009, 02:40:37 PM
by ennie
How can I co-parent with a BPD, PAS, and Enmeshing cult leader alf 7 678 Last post November 06, 2006, 09:55:22 PM
by Helpme
What am I missing? I need organized support... or something. alf 8 583 Last post February 19, 2008, 06:48:33 AM
by LEO
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