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Today's Feature: Is this all my fault? Did I cause this? read more
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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means generating the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tension with your ex.
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Subject Started by Replies Views Last post
WHO SHOULD POST ON THIS BOARD? BPDFamily 1 23653 Last post December 29, 2014, 01:27:39 PM
by livednlearned
CO-PARENTING: Doing what’s best for the kids BPDFamily 6 2429 Last post January 04, 2011, 11:14:41 PM
by BPDFamily
How to help my kids deal with their mom, when they don't want it. « 1 2  All » 00bp00 14 1812 Last post March 24, 2010, 05:15:27 AM
by little doggy
(question) RECORDED CONVERSATIONS 01fxdwg2 9 1103 Last post May 02, 2009, 09:01:58 PM
by Skip
new and hello 11yearsToGo 1 88 Last post January 12, 2015, 12:18:55 AM
by bravhart1
Bio-mom won't consent to counseling 11yearsToGo 7 259 Last post January 22, 2015, 08:52:44 AM
by david
my ex has BPD traits 154issues 1 189 Last post December 09, 2014, 04:08:53 PM
by DreamGirl
The end of his rope 17years 5 961 Last post April 12, 2006, 01:15:15 PM
by JoannaK
I need him to look after our son and the animals 1KitKat 7 167 Last post May 06, 2014, 06:27:03 PM
by 1KitKat
Daughter 8 started biting herself 1stand10 1 473 Last post November 16, 2010, 05:58:44 AM
by Blossom
I stood up for S14 - I want to tell him so bad « 1 2  All » 1stand10 16 1609 Last post August 25, 2011, 03:03:52 PM
by Matt
S14 finally saw stbx uBPDw's behavior 1stand10 0 305 Last post October 13, 2011, 10:31:05 AM
by 1stand10
D9's T says D9 is living in a fantasy world - and that it is okay 1stand10 4 517 Last post December 08, 2011, 10:03:01 PM
by david
Normal behavior for D9? 1stand10 7 653 Last post February 27, 2012, 03:35:05 PM
by 1stand10
Kids just returned from spring break with uBPDmother 1stand10 9 946 Last post April 26, 2012, 12:07:26 PM
by Matt
The Last Straw 1stand10 9 765 Last post May 24, 2012, 01:41:48 PM
by Matt
First visitation scheduled for today, already a problem « 1 2  All » 2bad2stay 10 927 Last post July 25, 2008, 05:44:40 PM
by funefarm4
How to deal with re-engagement attempt via the kids 2bad2stay 9 1112 Last post July 28, 2008, 09:28:36 PM
by Gagrl
What goes through his mind? 2bad2stay 3 436 Last post August 27, 2008, 06:20:08 PM
by 2bad2stay
S14 making life difficult. 2bad2stay 2 391 Last post September 25, 2008, 09:47:42 AM
by 2bad2stay
Visitation frustration and question 2bad2stay 5 534 Last post October 03, 2008, 09:17:11 AM
by LostAngel99
Back and forth with S14 2bad2stay 5 544 Last post October 27, 2008, 10:17:58 AM
by Moving On
Questions and concerns about the effect on the kids 2bad2stay 4 459 Last post November 17, 2008, 09:12:43 AM
by 2bad2stay
Full of questions today... sleeping arrangements « 1 2  All » 2bad2stay 11 935 Last post January 19, 2009, 01:44:12 PM
by Oy-vey!
How do you handle phone calls when the kids are with the ex? 2bad2stay 7 682 Last post January 04, 2009, 04:54:36 PM
by safetyfirst
Quick update on treadingwater's son 2bad2stay 6 724 Last post January 09, 2009, 12:09:35 PM
by Matt
Clothing vent « 1 2  All » 2bad2stay 11 976 Last post January 24, 2009, 04:34:50 AM
by UKBird
It's like clockwork. And I need help with a response. 2bad2stay 9 746 Last post January 23, 2009, 08:00:06 AM
by laurena82
Adult child just married BPXW nightmare negligence 30plusyears 6 837 Last post September 23, 2010, 02:50:39 PM
by Gagrl
her communication with the kids 4kids 0 320 Last post July 16, 2011, 05:23:53 PM
by 4kids
What should I do? 4theKids 9 1331 Last post September 15, 2009, 09:58:03 AM
by Her Mama
Telling daughter not to tell me things 55suns 4 253 Last post June 29, 2014, 09:38:39 AM
by david
"Because Mommy is Mean" 7971C 3 777 Last post September 22, 2009, 02:09:00 PM
by Scott828
Bad day yesterday 7yearsdrained 1 117 Last post December 30, 2014, 01:45:38 PM
by livednlearned
constant false allegations (posted on introduction posts) « 1 2 3  All » 95685dad 24 2176 Last post October 26, 2006, 09:03:06 PM
by kyrarae
Is it really possible to co-parent with an ex BPD? 95685dad 2 929 Last post January 21, 2008, 07:04:30 PM
by 95685dad
ex's supervised visitation & other info « 1 2 3  All » 95685dad 26 3164 Last post April 20, 2009, 02:55:42 PM
by 95685dad
School said daughter has progressed so much in the last month 95685dad 8 884 Last post April 08, 2009, 11:45:41 PM
by Matt
Always something with her... even when she has supervised visits « 1 2 3  All » 95685dad 20 2013 Last post May 22, 2009, 08:24:23 PM
by 95685dad
Daughter watched video of older sister when she was same age 95685dad 4 591 Last post May 26, 2009, 10:08:00 PM
by oneflewover
Ex blows up with Sunday visitation supervisor « 1 2 3 4 5  All » 95685dad 45 3491 Last post June 12, 2009, 06:14:45 PM
by marlo6277
Will BPD mom have push-pull cycles and splitting with her children A Dad 4 1515 Last post August 09, 2013, 02:36:14 AM
by A Dad
The last one out a hermit 1 471 Last post November 01, 2010, 06:01:50 PM
by DreamGirl
Therapy for Step-son A Step-Mom 5 508 Last post December 21, 2012, 02:04:39 PM
by A Step-Mom
Worried about step son's safety... « 1 2  All » A Step-Mom 13 828 Last post December 18, 2012, 02:23:07 PM
by DreamGirl
Slippery slope with missing school A Step-Mom 7 780 Last post December 06, 2013, 02:31:28 PM
by A Step-Mom
Apology to former stepdaughter? aandersonco 4 626 Last post November 18, 2008, 04:03:35 PM
by aandersonco
Four letter word for a BPD with a Facebook account Abigayle 3 450 Last post September 17, 2013, 11:09:31 PM
by Forward2free
Is BPD hereditary? « 1 2  All » ableft 19 3735 Last post April 18, 2006, 09:04:08 AM
by Peace4us
Wondering how to handle effect of dh w/BPD Aboutme2011 1 385 Last post June 04, 2011, 09:13:24 AM
by Matt
The issues my stepson is dealing with Aboutme2011 1 395 Last post June 04, 2011, 09:04:01 AM
by Matt
Thoughts about the kids Aboutme2011 9 783 Last post June 28, 2011, 09:05:14 PM
by Aboutme2011
Is your pwBPD abusive toward their own kids? « 1 2  All » Aboutme2011 13 1366 Last post June 24, 2011, 06:17:24 PM
by Soontobenidan
Where I get lost Aboutme2011 3 460 Last post June 23, 2011, 09:35:22 PM
by Aboutme2011
Had a talk with my SS today Aboutme2011 0 282 Last post June 25, 2011, 11:03:53 PM
by Aboutme2011
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