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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means generating the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tension with your ex.
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Subject Started by Replies Views Last post
CO-PARENTING: Doing what’s best for the kids BPDFamily 6 8146 Last post January 04, 2011, 11:14:41 PM
by BPDFamily
WHO SHOULD POST ON THIS BOARD? BPDFamily 1 27216 Last post December 29, 2014, 01:27:39 PM
by livednlearned
"Daddy" ruins plans for Little Bit's birthday... Her Mama 5 906 Last post January 19, 2007, 08:47:41 PM
by Her Mama
(question) RECORDED CONVERSATIONS 01fxdwg2 9 1427 Last post May 02, 2009, 09:01:58 PM
by Skip
a different kid depending on where she is spinning 2 825 Last post October 03, 2006, 08:52:32 AM
by salt
exBPDw claims SHE is thp ugghh 3 628 Last post November 19, 2014, 08:59:12 AM
by ForeverDad
First Day of School - How was it for you? ForeverDad 4 998 Last post August 27, 2009, 11:54:19 AM
by marlo6277
how BPD changed my life. lbh716 1 429 Last post August 13, 2015, 10:41:36 PM
by Turkish
Need Advice: NC or Try and do something for alcoholic BPD? « 1 2  All » confusedhubby 12 1303 Last post September 18, 2013, 03:33:16 PM
by allibaba
play hard ball they do LEO 5 928 Last post February 18, 2008, 04:48:45 PM
by LEO
uBPDad emotionally bullying & blackmail son... need advice « 1 2  All » kellaroo 15 2523 Last post October 25, 2006, 12:56:27 PM
by kellaroo
When you come to know copareting isnt possible. LEO 7 1131 Last post February 26, 2008, 05:22:08 PM
by LEO
Will you tell us more about yourself? livednlearned 9 1824 Last post April 07, 2015, 02:32:26 PM
by SWLSR
" Operating in the GREY area " Access & Visitation « 1 2 3  All » CitizenRalston 20 2735 Last post January 08, 2007, 09:44:56 AM
by laurena82
"and the beat goes on" « 1 2 3  All » ruralstressed 23 2877 Last post May 13, 2007, 09:03:24 PM
by Mount Si
"Be where you're supposed to be, when you're supposed to be there." Matt 5 1133 Last post November 23, 2009, 10:49:14 PM
by dutchie
"Because Mommy is Mean" 7971C 3 1024 Last post September 22, 2009, 02:09:00 PM
by Scott828
"but dad's not mean anymore..." Forward2free 8 1311 Last post September 24, 2013, 07:18:30 PM
by Forward2free
"Co Parenting" (my first start-up post in this section - EVER) spent18 9 1102 Last post March 12, 2008, 01:36:16 PM
by spent18
"Don't talk about my dad like that... " « 1 2  All » DreamGirl 16 2893 Last post January 27, 2010, 01:09:48 PM
by PDQuick
"emergency" phone call from BioM problemfamily 7 820 Last post September 01, 2008, 09:55:14 AM
by Stepmom04
"Everybody is Crazy" soccerstepmom 8 1342 Last post December 01, 2005, 09:53:23 AM
by John Galt
"evil stepmom" spinning 9 1281 Last post November 04, 2008, 05:10:56 AM
by spinning
"Father" version of "An Umbrella for Alex"? doryswimsagain 1 585 Last post June 21, 2012, 04:27:03 PM
by crystal
"Good" Anger « 1 2  All » Forestaken 10 702 Last post November 19, 2015, 07:52:08 AM
by whirlpoollife
"Good" parents early on? « 1 2  All » MuGGzy 18 1808 Last post January 05, 2012, 06:17:06 PM
by ennie
"harm avoidance" in children with BPD mothers livednlearned 9 1299 Last post June 17, 2015, 11:45:03 AM
by bravhart1
"healing Nons dilemma crystal 5 886 Last post March 14, 2009, 10:43:36 AM
by salt
"How could you do this to your mother?" What should kids tell their friends? Dogbert 8 1167 Last post August 06, 2007, 05:54:42 PM
by Dogbert
"I feel guilty" « 1 2  All » marlo6277 16 3013 Last post January 19, 2010, 07:14:08 PM
by marlo6277
"I'm seven years old, and I don't care" « 1 2  All » Sissy 15 1972 Last post January 02, 2008, 04:32:58 PM
by nowwhat
"I'm ugly" dutchie 6 876 Last post March 02, 2009, 07:31:21 AM
by lostinspace
"Mom is violating my right to privacy"... Concerned Dad in NY 5 976 Last post August 04, 2007, 12:57:27 AM
by meryl
"Mommy, I don't love you" daylily 6 1016 Last post September 30, 2012, 02:35:08 PM
by livednlearned
"My" little girl's story. Is there help for me raising the child of a BPD mother « 1 2  All » Her Mama 17 2623 Last post April 10, 2006, 01:17:36 PM
by Her Mama
"No thanks" « 1 2 ... 5 6  All » Matt 52 5163 Last post July 23, 2010, 03:22:55 PM
by DreamGirl
"no" parenting with uNPDx « 1 2  All » csandra 10 1164 Last post November 27, 2007, 12:26:34 PM
by JoannaK
"Parallel Parenting with a Borderlline" « 1 2  All » Over The Drama 19 2011 Last post February 24, 2008, 02:06:51 AM
by Kayci
"Pet" Names for the BPD/NPD Exes? « 1 2 3  All » Gagrl 20 2222 Last post July 18, 2007, 01:07:29 PM
by doc101
"Poll: When dealing with a BPD, it's o.k. to: " Started by salt JoannaK 8 1115 Last post March 07, 2007, 08:43:36 AM
by PamelaMc
"She says the same things about you" « 1 2 3  All » scraps66 23 1523 Last post May 09, 2015, 06:53:26 AM
by david
"She's dead to me" « 1 2 3  All » salt 21 2629 Last post May 22, 2007, 02:28:46 PM
by Fabelli
"Snuggling" in bed with the kids... « 1 2 3 4 5  All » Mr. M 48 4314 Last post March 08, 2008, 01:36:30 PM
by spent18
"The Talk" with S12. Matt 2 757 Last post May 03, 2011, 11:51:10 AM
by Matt
"The Tribe has Spoken... " Morphine 6 1897 Last post October 12, 2005, 08:19:52 AM
by Kystepmom2004
"Third Year Blues" CitizenRalston 6 968 Last post November 16, 2006, 09:53:31 AM
by bewildered
"Unmanned" phone calls from D7 Ulysses 7 702 Last post December 19, 2015, 05:23:02 PM
by Ulysses
"What's your theory?" marlo6277 6 934 Last post June 13, 2010, 02:11:55 PM
by marlo6277
"When I'm Ready" what is the meaning, taking baby to do something friendly OriginalofSpecies 4 759 Last post April 02, 2010, 01:07:33 AM
by LoveBeingADad
"Winning" doesn't mean she's gone « 1 2  All » BBB 16 1814 Last post November 11, 2006, 09:09:31 AM
by Oy-vey!
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