I hope by now that all of you have worked your way through the 5 lessons.
I must say that I have not done so. I only recently checked them out to see what it was that newbies were being told to read, but I believe I already have them down.
Where do you think you are stuck at?
* radical acceptance
* empathetic listening
* emotional validation
* boundaries and time outs
Both my partner and I do all of these things most of the time. Sometimes we forget, but with both of us actively using these same skills with each other, one of us usually remembers within a few minutes of the beginning of an incident and will bring up the idea of using the skill or use it. It's kind of amazing, really.
It's harder to always remember to use them when I'm not around my SO, usually I remember after a situation that I should have validated, or clarified that's what I needed, or radically accepted my life when I was feeling bad about it, or had better boundaries at work. But I'm working on it.
What is the hardest or scariest change for you to consider?
I think the hardest part for me was the fear of giving up my anger and my defenses, being more emotionally honest with someone I was really angry at and hurt by. I was afraid that by giving up my anger and my righteous desire to "hurt her back" I was giving up more power. But that's not what I was giving up--I was giving up my resentment, and allowing us both more happiness.