Wow, that sounds like my H bigtime! ? I've noticed mine getting worse over time too. Not fun. I think they need heavy duty help, professionally. Mine won't go get help, because he says I am the problem not him..
. All I can say is it really sucks dealing with a grown man that acts like a school-yard bully and/or sulking pouting child. Try to depersonalize, detach, leave the room or house when he does these things. The childish behaviors are extremely annoying...I dealt with this crap this weekend w/ my H.
Blaming, sulking, mocking, putting me down etc. As soon as he would start, I'd leave to another room. In my experience, they aren't capable or interested in any grown up normal conversation. Everything is superficial with mine. He doesn't even seem to have his own opinions or a real personality for that matter. I stopped confiding to my H, stopped saying my fears/worries, rarely say my opinions and if I do...I do not give a rats ___ what he thinks of it, I try not to depend on him anymore, etc. This has helped me deal in my situation.
I've basically given up hope on having a normal healthy happy relationship with him. That has given me more peace and freedom. I did go through a grieving period about this though, then anger, then acceptance. Sorry your having to deal with this crap in your life.
As far as grudges- he's the king and no amout of reasoning will ever get him to change his mind.
This is so familiar to me it's sick! Mine is miserable too and holds grudges over small things, accidents, and totally made up things. You cannot reason with them. They aren't interested in making things right for peace sake, at least mines not.
The only safe conversation is about her life, and agreeing with her even if she is wrong, but I lose myself in the process.
That's so true. It's really sad.