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Think About It... Some members think of "triangulation" as a dysfunctional behavior perpetrated on them by a person with BPD. And why not - this is how we often see triangles when we are in them and the '"odd man out"! However, seeing it this way is exactly the opposite of what we want to do to end the drama.. ~ Skippy
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Author Topic: Why can't he remember this?  (Read 87 times)
MockingbirdHL
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« on: May 05, 2013, 06:16:42 PM »

 I learned the other day that thoughts are not facts.  This may be obvious to every “normal” person, but I am not normal.  Thoughts, I’ve learned, are generated randomly and are automatic messages from our brains.  They are not necessarily true and not necessarily helpful.  We set ourselves up for failure by believing these thoughts.  We become upset and react to situations automatically.  When we accept the crazy thoughts running through our head as truth, they just keep coming and coming.  Have you ever noticed how hard it is to stop from basking in the negative thoughts you have?  You start thinking it’s true, and then you can’t stop your brain from going even deeper into that negative thought.  Thoughts pile up.   You become more distraught, more hopeless, more angery, more anxious.  We need to learn to challenge these thoughts.  We need to ask ourselves if these thoughts are true.
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crawler
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« Reply #1 on: May 05, 2013, 06:55:56 PM »

That's so well put. I wish my BPDgf would realize this somehow. She's enveloped in thoughts she sees as facts and they are tearing her and us to pieces. But I also have to learn this, discern her thoughts as being her own and not being facts which she is using against me. A really hard process, but I'm hopeful.
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Grey Kitty
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« Reply #2 on: May 05, 2013, 08:11:51 PM »

Here is a different perspective on "thoughts"

I've done some Buddhist meditation, and in that context, they talk of six "sense-doors" not five, six!

Five of them are the conventional five senses, sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch...  and the teaching is to notice directly what you are sensing in each of them, and then notice that you react to what you sense by immediately liking or disliking what you have sensed.

Here's the interesting part: They consider thought to be a sense-door as well. As in your thoughts are something that just appear in your head, just like a sound appears in your ear!

Now that is something cool to think about  grin
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MockingbirdHL
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« Reply #3 on: May 05, 2013, 10:01:09 PM »

I saw that on a blog I'm reading written by a person suffering from BPD. It's sad to read and realize that he isn't aware of this.
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