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Think About It... Acceptance doesn't mean you approve; it doesn't mean you're happy about something; it doesn't mean you won't work to change the situation or your response to it, but it does mean that you acknowledge reality as it is--with all its sadness, humor, irony, and gifts--at a particular point in time...~ Freda B. Friedman, Ph.D., LCSW, Surviving a Borderline Parent
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Author Topic: Feeling weak - painted black  (Read 222 times)
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« on: March 14, 2012, 11:56:46 AM »

I am painted black again. He (DBPDH) is attacking me emotionally & I am feeling too weak to battle. I am dealing with some hypertension problems & have had several oral surgeries over the past 18 months so I have not felt well much of the time. Feeling depressed sometimes too. He always seems to pick up on my weakness & hammers away. He is acting as if I am a worthless waste of a human being. I homeschool our 4 children & do the best I can to keep some order in the house. I get no support from him & now he is tearing me down.

I need some refreshers on dealing with this. I'm feeling really beaten down these days  cry
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Steph
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« Reply #1 on: March 14, 2012, 01:11:42 PM »

I am painted black again. He (DBPDH) is attacking me emotionally & I am feeling too weak to battle. I am dealing with some hypertension problems & have had several oral surgeries over the past 18 months so I have not felt well much of the time. Feeling depressed sometimes too. He always seems to pick up on my weakness & hammers away. He is acting as if I am a worthless waste of a human being. I homeschool our 4 children & do the best I can to keep some order in the house. I get no support from him & now he is tearing me down.

I need some refreshers on dealing with this. I'm feeling really beaten down these days  cry



  I think it makes sense for you to get a therapist for yourself and get the depression treated. Perhaps a light antidepressant can help turn that around and also the therapy to assist you in finding some skills in self care emotionally.

 Its important that you stop the damage by walking away from his emotional abuse. Leave the room, the house...and start listening to your own emotions. When you feel battered, you are. When he starts in with his abuse, look at him and stay " Stop it now" and walk out. Stay out. Dont interact with him until you both are settled again.
As long as you sit for his abuse, then he will keep doing it. It helps him feel better and as long as he has your permission to do it ( by allowing him to), he has no reason to change his behavior.

Steph
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united for now
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« Reply #2 on: March 14, 2012, 11:30:58 PM »

Self care if #1 Doing the right thing

It's easy to give and give and give and give till you aint got no more  ;p

What self care do you practice?
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Change your perceptions and you change your life.  Nothing changes without changes


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