She wants to give me back my paintbrushes - what do I do?

[Think About It...]

Cant she just mail these items? I wouldnt want her near my apt/home. You are doing great with NC really you are.

She does cause panic in me and trigger anxieties. I never feel like I'm prepared.

My BPDexgf and I live in neighboring towns.  I can't go to her town without feeling bad.  I have a friend that I've known for 20 years, and he had a little party to celebrate our professional/personal relationship.  I was in tears driving there.  I sat in the car for 20 minutes composing myself before I could go to the "party", and it's been, I don't know, 4 months since I saw my ex, longer since we were together.  I suppose saying this isn't a great deal of help, but I do know the idea of panic and anxiety.  It's terrible.  Just terrible. 

[nparade]

Cant she just mail these items? I wouldnt want her near my apt/home. You are doing great with NC really you are.

She does cause panic in me and trigger anxieties. I never feel like I'm prepared.

My BPDexgf and I live in neighboring towns.  I can't go to her town without feeling bad.  I have a friend that I've known for 20 years, and he had a little party to celebrate our professional/personal relationship.  I was in tears driving there.  I sat in the car for 20 minutes composing myself before I could go to the "party", and it's been, I don't know, 4 months since I saw my ex, longer since we were together.  I suppose saying this isn't a great deal of help, but I do know the idea of panic and anxiety.  It's terrible.  Just terrible. 

[suzn]

She's guilt tripping me. Is it fair of her?

When is it ever "fair" for someone to guilt trip you? Nope.. it's not fair. And guess what? You don't have to take it. You don't have to respond to it. You get to go on with your life, learn and grow. It may take changing your number but hey well worth it.

One day she'll just be somebody you use to know.

[nylonsquid]

Thank you everyone for the feedback, advice and support! 

I was on high stress that day but came out of it. I had to realize the subtlety of the manipulation she was doing.

I also remembered her saying that the guy she was seeing was moving away. "It's complicated" she says. 3 weeks after we broke up and it's complicated? Dang! So he might be out of the picture now and then Easter holidays was coming up, not to mention it was her birthday last week and I didn't contact her. I feel kind of bad about that (I really wanted to do something for her). All this explains why she wanted to contact me again.

It's sad to know that I'm just supply. No, it's hard to believe actually. I thought I had a great understanding of human behavior but she annihilated that. Couples hold on to the good memories in relationships and even when things are going terrible they would still try to make it work. My exBPD pulled the plug! That was unbelievable! I thought I had her hooked with everything including the sex which she emphasized. I guess I was wrong. No normal person can let a friendship, passion and great sex go.