DAY 1 OF "NO CONTACT" - Advise, experiences and suggestions wanted

[Think About It...]

Yeah for 2 weeks!  Great job!

What sorts of plans are you putting into place to combat the times when you are feeling lonely?

[mscj]

Yeah for 2 weeks!  Great job!

What sorts of plans are you putting into place to combat the times when you are feeling lonely?

[suz124w]

PeaveyT40

I am just like you!  Why is it as time passes, we think of the 'white' more and more and not the 'black'?  Is it our compassionate natures?  Our exes seem to function the other way round and our characters stay blackened in their eyes for such a long time.

In a way I envy my exBPD for being able to cut off and move on and so avoid all the heartsearching and pain.  But I believe they are in greater pain in the long run, destined as they are to repeat this pattern again and again for a whole lifetime if they don't get help.

I agree with your T, don't forget the white times as they brought you happiness (even if they were illusory in retrospect which kind of robs them of a lot of their sweetness) but remember the blacker moments too.  My sister has great common sense (and never liked him btw).  Her take on the whole affair is 'It was never right in the first place!'.  She is correct.  When I think back, there was always, always something not quite right even in the good times.  We airbrush them out.

Maybe it's time to edit them back in.   

Also, now that we know about BPD, we can be pretty sure that getting out was the best thing in the long run.  History has a tendency of repeating itself with our BPD friends and we don't really want to be stuck in that mire once we can see it for what it really is.