I would like him to tell her to knock it off.
I ignore any nonsense from X. I would not be happy if someone told me to tell her to knock it off rather than ignore it as I'm doing, especially since telling her to knock it off wouldn't work and would just create more drama for me.
Celebrate anyone who's managed NC or LC with a disordered person.
She says that he should open up to her and tell her what is really going on and that he needs to confide in her.
He'll never convince her this is not true. This is the part to ignore.
But then he quit ignoring her and playing into her by telling her he misses her and "loves her" or whatever else he felt she needed to hear to calm her down and apease her.
He should go back to ignoring her if that was effective for him. This part doesn't work.