Please remind me of all the good that comes from knowing all of this - it hurts, but it also validates that I dodged a bullet. I can't imagine that R/S working since it's based on deceit on both sides. Although I don't want to be stuck in wanting more pain for anyone either. I'm sure this one won't last either.
It hurts, I know it hurts and you will get through it. She is showing you who she is - let yourself grieve it so you can let go. You did dodge a fatal bullet, but the bullet did get you somewhat; it's ok to feel that hurt - it is the only way to move forward.
Hang in there!