I was reviewing the validation
tools and maybe I missed it but the examples are like pages from my life The problem is that after I validate she usually won't move on or she accuses me of being condescending or fill in the ______
What should I do then?
You insulted my cooking it's the last thing that I do good and after 20 years you took that away
It must really hurt to have your cooking insulted
You are an ass ( or something stronger)
I love your cooking
At this point she either goes silent ( I take as good self soothing) or she starts getting the dysregulated mean face and I disengage before it goes any farther
This is an example it's the attempt to push my buttons after validating that I am trying to diffuse should I do something different ?