So one of the major issues that my wife has mentioned during this latest episode is that she dosent feel like her life is right. The way she explains is that she dosent feel like she belongs in the life we built together. I know this us a common feeling for those with BPD. But IRS what's pushing her to want to call it quits. She actually isn't even living at the house right now and said she is 98 percent sure she will contact the lawyer this week. Is there any advice on how to make her feel more like she is a crucial part of the life we built. One problem us her income is small, and I pay all of the major bills. The only thing she has been paying is her own car insurance. But that's a she can afford. And I'm fine with that. I know its unlikely there is much I can do to help her feel like its her life but just figured it wouldn't hurt to ask here if anyone had advice.
Have u gently asked her to explain more to you?
Validation would be a really excellent tool for you to be using ( The Lessons )
" I dont feel I belong in the life we have together"
Validation: " Wow. Ok. I am not sure what you are meaning here.. can you help me understand more, because I really want to"
and go on from there, striving to HEAR her and to truly understand what she is trying to say.
Steph
