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Think About It... The Borderline and the narcissist. The borderline tends to be dominated mostly by abandonment fears, and the narcissistic person, by fear of the loss of specialness or appreciation.When the promise of that bond is threatened, the borderline responds with blame and attack defenses. The narcissist tends to withdraw, fears a loss of specialness, easily becomes injured or outraged ~Joan Lachkar, Ph.D..
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Author Topic: My New Life Now  (Read 264 times)
LifeIsOn
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« on: July 19, 2012, 07:13:04 AM »

Hello you all,

It been months since I been on this. I was a member on this when I was struggling through my b/u with my ex and I decided to start a new profile and talk about my story and start to help people who are going through what I went through.

First of all, I was madly in love a woman who was a BPD Waif and was about to marry her. In my heart I knew the r/s wasnt a healthy one at all but I loved that woman even she controlled and maniuplated me in many different ways. I lost many friends and my bond to my family when I was with my ex. I later regretted that. When she left me for another man, I was left heartbroken and wanted to be back with her. I felt like I was painted black and my ex had no remorse of what she did to me after she told me I was the one for her. I did not know about BPD at that time and how she did it to me didnt sound or feel right so I decided to find out what it was and discovered it was borderline. So I went insanely researching BPD to try to understand why she did it. I later on found out that I will never fully understand it and realized that learning so much about BPD and the help that I have had on this from others. It gave me peace.

Now to my new life, I started a new job and been busy with my new clothing line and it is soaring like crazy and business been good. I met a new girl and we started as friends since we both were healing our wounds from a bad relationship. She was pregnant when I met her but it didnt matter to me since we were just friends at that time. We were there for each other when we need help or support. She was so wonderful and understanding to me and not knowing that our feelings would grow into falling into love with each other. My life turned into the light. I was (sadly to admit that I abused myself by drinking to numb the pain) and was in a dark place but by keeping myself focused on new things and hobbies, my life took a turn and I thought I would never move on and be happy. I realized that I finally moved on and didn't think I would. I do think of the memories but I realized that I only miss the memories I created with my ex BPD but I didnt miss my ex anymore. Life has proved me wrong

A few months ago, my girlfriend gave birth to a beautiful girl and it was one of the best day of my life. I am so happy that I met her and she has shown me that life is a beautiful thing. She is someone that I come home and the first thing I get from her is a hug and a kiss and I get to hold her beautiful daughter and I feel great. She is everything my ex is not and I finally feel free and that my r/s is a very healthy one.

And Im proudly to bring up that I wrote an short article for a psychology magazine simply titled "I Loved A Borderline", as I felt that I needed to write my story about my experience with a borderline and how it was so horrible and dark and why I stayed for too long. I also felt that it was needed because BPD is rarely heard or known and it is very important for other to know about this disorder. The article was accepted  grin

From now on, I am going to be here to help people that are struggling and I am very willing to reply to them with my knowledge and messages that people wish to private message me about.

Its time to give back what I was given.

Thank you very much BPD Family.

 Doing the right thing

Remember that Life Is On and Life does get better afterwards. All it take is TIME. Take Care.
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« Reply #1 on: July 19, 2012, 12:39:58 PM »

Awesome post! It is very good to hear things like this to spread hope to others on this board.
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abusedbyBPD

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Posts: 67


« Reply #2 on: July 19, 2012, 04:20:29 PM »

Are you willing to share a link to your article?

Also, thank you for your encouraging words.  I'm sure many of us here are still searching for the light at the end of the tunnel.  It's great to know that there is in fact an end.
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