Vacation? Is it possible?

[Think About It...]

My D is currently living with her BPD dad.  She is BPD too.

My wonderful hubby and  decided to make a break for it and go on a much needed vacation out of town where there are no cell phones.

We are trying to keep it secret because this type of even usually triggers some tremendous chaos, either while we are away or right when we come back.

Currenly, D isn't even speaking to me.

I never speak to BPD dad because he is extremely abusive to me.

Has anyone had luck getting a vacation and actually enjoying it? What's is like if ou have?
Wish me luck!

[Forgetmenot]

My D is currently living with her BPD dad.  She is BPD too.

My wonderful hubby and  decided to make a break for it and go on a much needed vacation out of town where there are no cell phones.

We are trying to keep it secret because this type of even usually triggers some tremendous chaos, either while we are away or right when we come back.

Currenly, D isn't even speaking to me.

I never speak to BPD dad because he is extremely abusive to me.

Has anyone had luck getting a vacation and actually enjoying it? What's is like if ou have?
Wish me luck!

[twojaybirds]

I just returned from 8 days away and have a 4 day road trip planned in a few weeks.

I never tell my dd when I am gone or really anything I am doing. 
1. I am an adult and not responsible to report to her
2. I don't want her to know when the house is empty even for going out for an hour.
3.  She would probably start texting  me with all the triggers she could...kidney pain, ER visits,   no place to stay.
4.  While I was just away, one day she did text me. "are you home.".  I replied with. "are you home".  she said nope.  and then was on to the next thing.

Less is totally more.   I have started not to respond to most of her texts or emails.  or at least waiting a day. so she is not alerted if I dont respond.

this week I coud have a panicked over the kidney infection
going to college in Arizona
and today the new text of leaving camp today

none of them have had any follow through

do not waste your energy on accommodating what may or may not happen
plan your vacation like an adult and now your dd and her dad will continue to make whatever choices whether u are there or not.

you need and deserve this vacation...trust me...mine did a word of good for my mental health.

[heronbird]

We had a holiday booked for last year, we were going to cancel it, but the doctor said we shouldnt because  this illness is for ever and we cant put our life on hold. So we decided to go and it was ok, only a week though.

This year I didnt want to go on holiday because I just didnt know what was going to happen with unpredictable dd.

We are going away in three weeks, not abroad though. I didnt tell dd yet because I just dontknow how she would feel.

I will have a good time though, and ring dd now and again, she dont need me right now, she has her bf.

I did enjoy my hol last year even though I didnt know how dd was doing, and that was abroad, dd did miss me that time but it wasnt for long. I enjoyed it but not like before she was ill, there was a sadness in my head in the background.

I hope you have a good time, enjoy your break. Let us know

[Forgetmenot]

Oh thanks guys!

Your posts helped more than I can say!


Vacation is book.  We're going.

[Thursday]

So glad to hear you are going. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy! You will return a new woman, recharged, refreshed.

Thursday