She keeps showing up and jamming up my time

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

So my ex wife and I are going through the divorce gauntlet here in our state.  Why oh why does this process take so darned long?  A year separation before you can file.  Mandated mediation after that.  Lawyer says at best I will have custody hearing in July and Settlement hearing in September.  You have got to be kidding me!  Anyways, reason I am writing is that I have my girls this weekend.  Just put them into bed.  D9 and D4.  Well tomorrow my ex is planning to show up at the D9's ballet lesson.  Ex has also scheduled activities on Sunday... . swimming classes.  Anyone else see a trend where the BPD tries to horn in on the other parent's time with the children using activities like this.  Ex wife is a stay at home mom and sees the girls all week.  I work 60-80 hours a week.  My time with the girls is precious and I don't want to be dealing with her toxicity during my time with my daughters. 

[Eodmava]

So my ex wife and I are going through the divorce gauntlet here in our state.  Why oh why does this process take so darned long?  A year separation before you can file.  Mandated mediation after that.  Lawyer says at best I will have custody hearing in July and Settlement hearing in September.  You have got to be kidding me!  Anyways, reason I am writing is that I have my girls this weekend.  Just put them into bed.  D9 and D4.  Well tomorrow my ex is planning to show up at the D9's ballet lesson.  Ex has also scheduled activities on Sunday... . swimming classes.  Anyone else see a trend where the BPD tries to horn in on the other parent's time with the children using activities like this.  Ex wife is a stay at home mom and sees the girls all week.  I work 60-80 hours a week.  My time with the girls is precious and I don't want to be dealing with her toxicity during my time with my daughters. 

[NyGirl8]

Frustrating!   Maybe a question for your lawyer.  Possibly a way to limit this through the court order?  Possibly proof of her controlling ways to present in court?

[david]

When ex first left she used to do this kind of stuff too. What I noticed is the less I reacted the less she showed up.

Our oldest was in karate. In the beginning she would take him on her time and I would be there too. Over time she stopped taking him altogether. I took him on my time and she stopped showing up there.

She signed our youngest up for soocer years ago. I showed up for the first practice, noticed the coach was overwhelmed and volunteered to help. He was grateful and we worked together the entire season. Ex stopped showing up halfway through the season.

I always kept my distance since she constantly accused me of abuse. She still does and I haven't spoken to her in over two years. I only communicate through email. Within the last 6 months I have been accused of physical, verbal, emotional, and spiritual abuse in emails. I ignore.