As you are seeing, our BPD/BPD traits partners boomerang from one emotion or feeling to the opposite on a fairly regular basis; "I love you so much!" one day, and "I don't love you at all" the next. Because of that, only you can know if he's on his way to end the relationship or not. Or even if
you want to end the relationship because of the push/pull going on with him.
One way to deal with his behaviors that are giving you the feeling that the relationship may end at any moment is to check out every single
link to the right-hand side of this page, where you will get a better handle on how his mind works. You will also learn the communication skills that will teach you how to not push every one of his buttons, and make it easier to deal with him at those times when he's dysregulating... .
Something, though, that concerns me is the abuse you are alluding to... .Is this something that happens often? None of that should get validated, or even tolerated. You need to set some
Boundaries that will keep you safe and unharmed or unbullied. Please check this out:
Safety First and make a Safety Plan just in case, and also read this:
TOOLS: Domestic Violence Against Women. I really want you to stay safe, and that is another important aspect of the relationship you have with him. Any future with him must take this behavior into consideration if it is something that happens regularly.
I'm sorry that your anxiety issues are affecting your employment situation, and it's understandable that your boyfriend is concerned about it, too. I can see that it would affect his thoughts about a long-term relationship and that he is thinking about it in that light. But, it wouldn't excuse his abuse if that is something he is doing to you... .You'll have to tell us more about your situation so we know how to guide you better, misuniadziubek.