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Author Topic: What I say she wants to do the opposite  (Read 371 times)
Flora73
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 110



« on: August 20, 2014, 04:33:30 PM »

Can anyone shed some light on why my BPDgf wants to do the opposite to what I say?

When I call her on it, she will say = Its like your my parents and I want to do the opposite... .

Any ideas
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Flora73
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 110



« Reply #1 on: August 20, 2014, 05:23:54 PM »

Could it be they often feel that your freedom is being threatened, which motivates them to regain choice and control by doing exactly the opposite?
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maxsterling
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic Partner
Relationship status: living together, engaged
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« Reply #2 on: August 20, 2014, 05:57:47 PM »

Sounds like she already answered your question Smiling (click to insert in post)  pwBPD tend to exhibit the same behaviors and coping mechanisms as a child.  And according to her, that is what she is doing!  Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)  I've actually found it helps me to rationalize and have more patience with the chaos if I think of my fiancĂ© as someone who did not learn adult coping mechanisms, and I adjust my behavior as if I was a parent. 

As for specifically why she does this - well, why do teenagers do this?  It may be the same reason.  She may just want to express her independence from you.
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Flora73
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
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« Reply #3 on: August 20, 2014, 06:47:38 PM »

Thank you  maxsterling  Being cool (click to insert in post)

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