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Author Topic: Is she going to cut me out now..on her path of self destruction.  (Read 370 times)
Chasing_Ghosts
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 265


« on: September 13, 2014, 01:16:34 AM »

My exBPDgf reached out for me the other day but it was about getting her opiates. She is an ex heroin addict and her excuse for this is working a 50 hour work week and that she is cant sleep(night terrors from trauma) and is in constant pain.(emotional manifesting some physical) This to me is a boundary i can no longer let her cross. She knows im very well against it as i told her before it was me or the addiction but i sometimes faltered to make my words stay true to my actions with her few slip ups i tolerated in the past with painkillers. So i stuck strong and i didnt answer until she brought up only being able to get heroin. Of course this triggered me as im betting she counted on. Even said "I can get it you know but i thought you could help me get pills instead. Its whatever im at the point im going to shoot up and just not stop." Of course i responded by saying basically "you know where this path leads is that really what you want?" She responds with "i dont care anymore since no one will help me get anything else." And my final response is that "i do care alot and dont want to see you fall back into addiction/ruin your life and that the pain is more than physical. Your battling the demons from the past everyday and of all people i understand but this isnt the answer." Of course no response on her end after this.

Im just curious is she going to cut me out now that i havent met her needs and am no longer useful in her BPD disordered thought pattern? Do you think i triggered her with that last response/couldve responded in a better way? Also im debating on showing her mother the texts soon... would she see this as a violation of trust/going behind her back and paint me blacker than black? 

P.S. Im proud of myself for staying strong to my boundaries for once but im worried of her usage as i cant tell if she serious or not from the sound of it she seems to have hit rock bottom as she was already very low after our prior recycle over a month ago. I think this may have been on some level a cry for help.
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Rockylove
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« Reply #1 on: September 13, 2014, 09:10:36 AM »

She may very well cut you out.  It isn't your fault that she's in the predicament she's in.  Is there someone (one of her family members) that you can call to make them aware of the situation?  I know you don't want to see her self destruct, but as with any addict, she'll need to hit rock bottom on her own.   
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dog_star

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« Reply #2 on: September 13, 2014, 12:50:01 PM »

Also im debating on showing her mother the texts soon... would she see this as a violation of trust/going behind her back and paint me blacker than black? 

I know that my dBPDw would views me sharing our text communication with our marriage counselor as a violation of tust. She will sometimes grill me regarding it.
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