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Author Topic: i feel used  (Read 362 times)
BrokenFamily
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 223



« on: October 20, 2014, 04:20:54 PM »

She left me and our 1 year old after 4 years totally out of the blue , painted me black and started seeing a new guy the same week. She has been making me jump thur hoops by bringing her cigarettes, giving her rides, cleaning her mother's house and anything else she so desires and I'm more than willing just to get on her good side. It seems I'm no longer painted black but she insists she no longer feelsthe same about me and really has feelings for the new guy : ( I'm an idiot that's about at the end of his rope.
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BrokenFamily
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 223



« Reply #1 on: October 20, 2014, 04:23:08 PM »

It's been a month and I've stopped crying and I'm actually content with being single and the breakup as long as she's being nice but the second she don't respond to my calls or texts (which is often) I crumble
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Pou
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Non existent. Co-habitat. She is extremely abusive and manipulative.
Posts: 344


« Reply #2 on: October 20, 2014, 04:38:38 PM »

You deserve much better than your ex.  keep a healthy distance from her.  I don't think you should be doing anything for her or her mom.  Unless you are doing it because of your child.  I don't know the details but you may want to consider to have your child taken care by a relative (who you trust 110%) for now and go for a week or two weeks vacation … far away form home.  so you have time to think it over and revaluate without any prior distractions.  best luck to you.
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BrokenFamily
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 223



« Reply #3 on: October 20, 2014, 05:05:32 PM »

I caved in again and took her to work unfortunately when she called her Twitter status came up and she was saying how much she misses him. Frustrated I asked her how it's possible she can even be emotionally involved with someone the same week we broke up, it's like you never love me and don't give a ___ our family is a mess, she as always turned the tables and said see this is why we aren't together! I'm such an idiot

There's no family to care for our daughter I lost my job over this and I'm in no emotional shape to go on vacation
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Pou
****
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Non existent. Co-habitat. She is extremely abusive and manipulative.
Posts: 344


« Reply #4 on: October 21, 2014, 02:55:04 PM »

I caved in again and took her to work unfortunately when she called her Twitter status came up and she was saying how much she misses him. Frustrated I asked her how it's possible she can even be emotionally involved with someone the same week we broke up, it's like you never love me and don't give a ___ our family is a mess, she as always turned the tables and said see this is why we aren't together! I'm such an idiot

There's no family to care for our daughter I lost my job over this and I'm in no emotional shape to go on vacation

BrokenFamily, when I said I understand ... I really understand.  Trust me, not to compare or anything … I have been through what you have gone through with another girl who I was with for 10 years and your scenario came up like 3 times.   Now, my uNPDw… well... not going to rehash if you are interested, do a little search and you will find it.  It really doesn't matter who has it bad … everyone is different and no one should go through what you are going through… it is just not fair.  But the problem is … you can not change it.  But what you can change is how you deal with it and experience it.  Again, I really think you ought to put yourself first.  Stop driving her or her mom around.  Turn your phone to ignore when you seem them calling you.  Spend time with your kid … do something fun together and bond.  Go hiking or just spend time together.  Do not ever love someone or something that won't love you back.  That is a quote that I keep it dear to my heart.  You are allow to "give" and not expect anything in return… and that is ok if you could.  Your post reads like you want to give,but you want something back in return …. like for her affection.  Well, you know she has moved on … so she is not loving you back, so don't torture yourself over it.  I know it is hard … you two had a history and have a family together.  But I have been there and sometimes it is really much better if it just doesn't stay together.  When it is toxic … you don't want to be in it ... perhaps consider yourself fortunate that this separation taking place.  Just try to see thing on the positive side … good luck.


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BrokenFamily
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 223



« Reply #5 on: October 21, 2014, 04:34:05 PM »

Thank you, we had a good talk I set boundaries and explained I felt used and she understands I will not be jumping to make her happy anymore. I'm okay with the breakup now, I realized being hurt, having someone make false accusations and treating you badly isn't any way to live.
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Pou
****
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Non existent. Co-habitat. She is extremely abusive and manipulative.
Posts: 344


« Reply #6 on: November 06, 2014, 08:36:48 AM »

Thank you, we had a good talk I set boundaries and explained I felt used and she understands I will not be jumping to make her happy anymore. I'm okay with the breakup now, I realized being hurt, having someone make false accusations and treating you badly isn't any way to live.

BrokenFamily, definitely!  You are in a tough spot and it will take lots of courage and heart just to keep it straight.  As you have seen before, a conversation with a PD won't ever end as easy as 1,2,3... I am sure you will experience more drama and more irrational events… stay strong.  Be understanding, that they can not help what they do, but you can draw the line and protect yourself… and that is all you can do.  best wishes
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