halloween is my husband first counseling session.

[Wanda]

Well my husband made his first counseling session . I have been reading the tools and such on here. It is so hard to remember he has BPD , and at times things can get out of control.

I talked to a counselor and I plan to go in Jan. Due to money... he is going now. I don, t expect anything or any outcome except to remember he has BPD.  It has been a while . Not even sure if this counselor will pick it up. I know at any rate talking to someone will do us both good.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Determined1]

Being aware of the presence of a mental illness and talking to someone about it are always the first two steps that must be taken in attempts to change the current situation. Yes there is a plethora of information on this site and just learning them one at a time and incorporating them into your strategies and overall mental health well being will make you forget about the numerous steps that must be taken. Once it sinks it and you are on autopilot mode, it will come much more naturally. Just never forget to take care of yourself, especially in terms of crisis situations. I am still learning to do that myself. I wish you all the luck and keep us posted!

[Wanda]

This is my second time after dealing with this 16 years ago. I stayed strong for years one other time I had to refreshing things. Alot of reading.BPD is a life long journey so be prepared. I just didn, t want what I went through 16 years ago to be like that when we retire. And thankfully it won, t thanks for your reply... .

[Determined1]

It most certainly is a life long struggle. I am six years in but I do want to spend the rest of my life with my wife. Continue to stay strong and remember that you are not alone in this 

[MissyM]

Sounds like you have such a great attitude about it.  I am looking into some new modalities of therapy and hoping that some of the couple's work that deals with attachment, is going to help us bring some trust into our relationship.  I really want more intimacy and safety within my marriage.  My dBPDh is on board with this and I am intrigued by learning new things about me, us and him.

[Wanda]

We have been married 17 years. I have known just as long about BPD my husband is very high so it is hard to detect it . Over the years I just learned to take care of me. So a good attitude that I have thanks for the compliment. Bpd is a life long commitment and u have to be the strong one.to tell u the truth I can, t remember him being this bad.in a long time. He still is disregulating off and on. Not as bad. But yes it wears on me. Holidays are comming up he has to cqalm down about it all remember we now are dealing with alot of black thinking.

oh and trust that is an issue now due to he has no trust in me or my daughter... .