Replacement r/s brings kids - gulp

[Hawk Ridge]

Just curious about the experiences of others.  Before my ex and I became involved, she was with a partner that had children who irritated my ex because they would do things that were not perfect and not in line with her thinking, ie., blowing up a ball wrong, leaving a magazine on the wrong table.  I don't have children nor does my ex so that wasn't an issue for us, allowing her more opportunity to notice all,the things I don't do perfectly. :-( Anyway, after she left me, she became involved with my replacement, a person with multiple young adult and teen age children.  Recently, I stopped by my ex's house with invitation and noticed it was rather messy, out of character for her.  My replacement goes there on weekends.   I noticed stuff not belonging to her strewn about and found myself wondering how she was doing with these children as she appeared rather depressed and dysregulated.  Any thoughts or experiences on how BPD's handle r/s with children in their hime thar are not theirs?

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[Iwilldecide]

I'm curious about this too as I have children myself. I have purposely kept my uBPDbf at a distance from them because I can tell he is not a kid person and I just don't see the point of them intermingling. but for the future I could see that he would probably be mad at one of them and blame one of them instead of me. (which I don't like for obvious reasons)