I feel it coming in the air tonight... Oh lord...

[Mr. Solo]

Something has me uneasy. My dBPDw (separated) has been very quiet the last 3-4 days. The times that I have seen her, she has looked ROUGH. Hasn't changed clothes. Hasn't showered. Looks like she just got out of bed. Doesn't talk much about anything. Doesn't smile. She just seems very blah. She normally calls or texts (and complains) about her friends or neighbors but she hasn't done that. It makes me think, she must be complaining to everyone else about me then. LOL.

She has also started to play little mind games (or what I think are mind games). For example, S9 left his favorite pair of shoes at her apartment. I asked her if I could come get them. She said I could and for me to come at 9pm and she would have them at the door and ready to go. It takes about 10 minutes to drive to her place so I left about 8:45. I texted her as I was leaving letting her know I was on the way. We have iPhones and have read receipts on so I knew she didn't read the text I sent saying I was on the way. I text her when I get on her street. No read receipt. I pull in her drive way and text her to tell her I am here. Nothing. I sit there for 15 minutes, with my lights on and shining directly on her living room window. She falls asleep easily so I thought maybe she had fallen asleep. I tried calling but she didn't answer. I was aggravated because I wanted to get back to the kids. I sat there for a few more minutes and then tried calling again. This time she answered and I asked, "What happened? I thought maybe you fell asleep or something." She got mad and said, "My god! I'll be out there in a second." and hung up. She walked down the driveway and gave me the shoes. I didn't say anything to her other than thanks. She said, "I don't understand why you are irritated." I explained we talked about me coming at 9pm and so I was here but had to wait 15-20 minutes. She said, "Oh! I'm sorry. I was sitting in my car smoking with (neighbor/friend). We thought we saw lights but we thought it was a car just going down the street so we just kept smoking." Well, that really pissed me off because there is no way, if in her car smoking, they didn't know it was me. They could see my car! Plus, considering we had talked about me coming at 9pm she should have been expecting me. Plus, I was texting and calling (and she had her phone with her!). I felt like it was very inconsiderate but I held it together. I really wanted to say, "That makes no sense. You knew I was sitting here waiting. There is no way you didn't know but you kept smoking?" Instead, I just said, "Okay, well, thanks. I'll talk to you tomorrow," and started to back out. She went nuts! "OH I GUESS YOU THOUGHT I WAS JUST SCREWING AROUND AND MADE YOU WAIT ON PURPOSE? YOU THINK I WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT?" I stopped and said, "If you recall, all I said was I thought you may have fallen asleep. It's fine." She said, like I didn't say a thing, "WELL, I WOULDNT DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND I DONT APPPRECIATE THE ATTITUDE!" I did have an attitude. I guess that was enough to set her off? But, seriously, it appears she did, IN FACT, make me wait while she smoked. I left and haven't brought it back up. It doesn't seem like a big deal but that's the type of stuff she used to do when she was in a BPD rut. She has done a few other things that could qualify as small gaslighting scenarios and she hasn't been doing these things.

So, I am on edge. I feel like something big is coming. She has started being clingy with the kids. She has also started doing things like insisting on picking up the kids when normally she lets me do it everyday (I want to because I like getting out of the house). It is just small things but I know what it normally ends up being. I wish I knew what was going on with her and how to help her head it off or, at least, be able to keep it from effecting me and the kids so much.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

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