I’m curious about why she was passive-aggressive about refusing it, though. What would have happened if she has simply been direct and said, “I’m not in the mood.”? Do you think that your admitted frustration is preventing her from being honest with you about that?
Occassionaly she will be direct. I appreciate that... .
PA is part of how she is... I wish she would be direct. She is a master at answering questions with rhetorical questions... .and not giving a clear answer.
My take is that when she "gets that way"... .or is ruminating about something in her head she is usually oppositional to anything I want. Sometimes I can work through it and bring her down... .sometimes not.
Bringing up her "opposition" will get a reaction from her... .
So... "do you want to go upstairs and have sex?" (from me) "I'm walking up the stairs... .aren't I?" (from her) Not said that night... but an example of an interaction. Not a playful tone either... .