should i stay or should i go

[married21years]

Hi all have a flight booked to canada tomorrow.

it is my daughters high school graduation.

and i really dont want to get on that plane

i cant deal with this feces right now i am not strong enough 

i have a life of sacrifice for others. and i just want to book a holiday to Crete instead on warm sunny beaches with the wind in my hair sand in my toes.

and a bit of sailing

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[mindwise]

Hi Married21years,

I understand how hard it must be for you. Specially now that you don't feel "strong enough".

It's a very personal decision. Your daughters high school graduation is an important event in her life too and I'm sure she'd be happy to see you there. If you cancel the flight make sure you speak with her and explain your moment of weakness.

Perhaps you can find inner strength, fly to Canada, assist to the graduation and limit the contact with your wife to a minimum. Staying inside your bubble, not letting negative vibes get to you and focusing on the love you have for your daughter. 

Just putting my thoughts out there.

Best wishes

[MaroonLiquid]

I know what you are going through is hard, but in spite of that, make your daughter's day the focal point and as mindwise said, keep contact with your wife to a minimum.  Don't let your wife's crap keep you from something you may regret later.

[married21years]

i hear what you are all saying but i need to protect me from the craziness

this is insane and i always sacrifice for others

[sweetheart]

Hello married    

I just want to echo ML and mw in suggesting that if you can focus on your daughter not your wife's behaviours, would this make the trip more possible for you?

And don't forget this forum and it's members are always here 24/7 if you need extra support while you are away.

Is there anyone else going with you that could be supportive if you are struggling ?  

[sweetheart]

I just cross posted, so in reading your reply I can hear that the craziness has become too much for you at the moment, and that by going on the trip you wouldn't be protected from it. That must feel very overwhelming.

Can you talk with daughter about how you are feeling, does she understand what is going on ?