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Author Topic: Is he recycling with a former "friend"?  (Read 351 times)
shatra
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1292


« on: July 14, 2015, 06:30:58 PM »

Hi---

  I am on a "break" with my pwBPD due to scheduling difficulties. We have not been in contact, and I stopped by on Saturday early morning to pick up some CDs (unannounced).  I got very upset because I saw the car of his "friend" parked on the street----she is someone who also has BPD, and is attracted to my pwBPD (2 red flags).  I talked to him and he insisted (as he has for several years) that they are just friends (even though she wants more). She had slept over "because she lives out of state and wasn't going to drive all the way back after the visit". 

    I  certainly have friends of the opposite sex sleep over my apartment as just friends. I also noted that my pwBP's son was there (BP is divorced, and though he allows friends to sleep over if his son is there, he has a strict boundary that he doesn't allow a girlfriend to stay over while the kids are at home---this made me believe him that she is just a friend).

    I am feeling very upset and unsure over this. My main trigger is that she is attracted to him, has BPD, and that I know that it is not uncommon for BPs to not respect boundaries. Any thoughts?

Thanks

Shatra
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This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

Daniell85
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« Reply #1 on: July 14, 2015, 09:18:18 PM »

How long is the break?
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shatra
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« Reply #2 on: July 15, 2015, 04:32:16 PM »

  The break has been for the past 5 months due to work/scheduling problems. It is open-ended

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