Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 28, 2024, 09:40:59 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Things we can't ignore
What Does it Take to Be in a Relationship
Why We Struggle in Our Relationships
Is Your Relationship Breaking Down?
Codependency and Codependent Relationships
93
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Trying to decide whether to go again  (Read 352 times)
Remiman
**
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 56


« on: August 16, 2015, 03:38:29 PM »

Hi guys. Please can I get some comments / advice.

Brief history. ExBPDGf, 15 yrs my junior. Been on/off for about 15 months. I have two kids from previous relationship. Been though 3 break-up cycles, and the last one I've been trying to resist gettin back for about three months. Been a struggle every day. Tried NC but she always finds a way. Common interests that I WONT give up.

Saw her twice at the start of last week and That kicked things off. Then yesterday I ended up spending the whole day in her company. On the one hand it felt amazing having her close. And I couldn't stand it if she was more than a foot away from me. But on the other hand I was so anxious and virtually having a panic attack all day. She wants to get back, and I'm so anxious because I think it will go bad and our break ups are so so bad - suicide attempts/threats, self harming, raging at my house (which has got worse with each breakup). I'm desperate for the good times, but I'm so anxious whenever I'm around her - just waiting for the next destructive conversation. Do I try again?
Logged
RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

ptilda
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 243


« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2015, 12:21:00 AM »

I'm sorry you're feeling so desperate. First of all, no one can make that decision for you. Second, I think you already know what you should do for now. Keep in mind that there are legal ways to keep someone away from you.

You said you're desperate for the good times, but it is NEVER good relationship mentality to think of the good times as being dependent on the relationship. Whether you're with her or not, you'll learn that good times are 100% on you. Find how to make that happen independently and you'll be stronger.

And please make sure you're in therapy and have a support network.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!