Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 28, 2024, 07:29:30 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Experts share their discoveries [video]
99
Could it be BPD
BPDFamily.com Production
Listening to shame
Brené Brown, PhD
What is BPD?
Blasé Aguirre, MD
What BPD recovery looks like
Documentary
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Interesting Situation  (Read 400 times)
thrownforaloop
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Single
Posts: 126



« on: May 20, 2016, 09:11:21 PM »



So an interesting situation is sort of forming... .Since our separation, about a month ago, my ex has been dropping the ball as a parent to my SS7. She has been too busy with her new boyfriend and partying and keeps making excuses as to why she can't make time for childcare. However, her mother has been keeping our SS7 the majority of time--except when I go to get him from her.

Today, my ex's mother called me and talked to me for about 20 minutes--she was saying how her daughter is spoiled and untrustworthy with money and that she isn't taking being a parent seriously. She made it seem like she appreciates me and that trusts my judgment. Bizarre and sad that she seems to be taking my side over her own daughter's. This seems like it'll be good though. If I can get a situation going where I'm basically coparenting with my ex-mother-in-law, I may just be able to escape the bulk of the stress.

It's also a relief because, up until today, I thought my ex's mother hated me. As it turns out, that is just something my ex had been feeding me in order to maintain the control over both of us and force us to go through her. Well, now I can see through her lies. Feels good to communicate with people other than her.
Logged
Herodias
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1787


« Reply #1 on: May 20, 2016, 09:27:18 PM »

Glad you had a good talk... .the parents know. They do... .hope you can works things out so that it is best for your child. Just keep your conversation between the two of you private , so she knows she can trust you, she doesn't want the wrath of her daughter either.
Logged
thrownforaloop
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Single
Posts: 126



« Reply #2 on: May 21, 2016, 07:36:29 AM »

Glad you had a good talk... .the parents know. They do... .hope you can works things out so that it is best for your child. Just keep your conversation between the two of you private , so she knows she can trust you, she doesn't want the wrath of her daughter either.

Thanks, I will do that. It's funny you say that--my ex's mother was also complaining about how quick her daughter has been to yell at her lately. I do wish that her mom would help her get counseling or something, but I suppose that's something she needs to do for herself.
Logged
Herodias
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1787


« Reply #3 on: May 21, 2016, 07:41:24 AM »

Yes, my Mother-in-law has been to lots of counseling for herself. You cannot make someone go to counseling, because when you do, they don't really want it for themselves and don't do the real work.  Unfortunately they need to hit a sort of rock bottom in life to want to deal with it. DBT is the only thing I have heard that works for this... .learning to regulate emotions.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!