nasty wife

[johnnyboy]

My wife has BPD and i have been living with her for 25 years. I've left three times and then was charmed back. What a manipulative b___.

She's not as bad as she was but I can't believe a human can be so nasty and not care about it. At times I feel she is EVIL, barely human.

Greedy, greedy, greedy, shallow, shallow, nasty.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Ysabel]

It's hard to reconcile with someone who denies and justifies , blames you and feels no remorse. Their version of reconciliation looks a lot different from ours, where there is honesty and humility in the apology. And change. My hwBPD lacks humility but will spiral into shame instead and threaten suicide. I feel for you. If you stay because of financial or family reasons, you will find help reading these posts. Read some and reply every morning before you interact with her, so you are less likely to sucome to constant conflict. Develop a full life outside of her. Think of her as ill, not evil, it helps you, even if she is evil! Medication has helped my hwBPD to slow down his dysregulation and to recoverore quickly, but he never changes at his core. That is the reality of a character disorder , they are stable and resistant to change over time. It's not you. You didn't make her this way. Do you have children? Think about it, are you a parent with BPD? If not, how could you be a spouse with BPD and not a parent, or a son, or a friend with BPD. Your conflict is probably limited to your relationship with your wife. Her conflict is, no doubt, pervasive and apparent in all her close relationships. Good luck and prayers... .