Welcome Sewnles: Sorry about the problems in your partner's past. Has she had any therapy?
Has your partner mentioned suicide recently?
The information in the link below can be helpful when someone in your life deals with suicidal thoughts. Every threat needs to be taken seriously
https://bpdfamily.com/pdfs/safety_first.pdf
she has mentioned suicide and even want to push me away . i fear for her. i fear for her . i know it is common , but is it my fault ? What can i do ?
It isn't your fault. Fear, Obligation and Guilt (FOG) are common for those with a BPD person in their life (pwBPD). The links below should be helpful.
FOG = Fear, Obligation and Guilt https://bpdfamily.com/content/emotional-blackmail-fear-obligation-and-guilt-fog https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=82926.0Can you give us some examples of other BPD type behavior your partner exhibits? Perhaps it might help to discuss some other behavior problems and we can lead you to some specific tools to help. In the meantime, the additional link below can be helpful.
COMMUNICATIONS OVERVIEWhttps://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=69272.0