Sister doesn't get radical acceptance... conflict of personalities with wife

[guitarguy09]

My family has been getting together steady for about a year now (meaning my side of the family). Yesterday that came to a screeching halt. We had been planning a short cabin trip with the entire family that my uBPDw had been stressing out about for weeks. After some text exchanges with my sisters, and tensions being high in general, my parents said we should only get together separately and not as the whole family.

You would think my wife would be happy with this right? Wrong. Now she blames herself, and wants me to divorce her so I can "be with someone who is acceptable." What a situation. First one thing then another.

Any suggestions on how to tell her I don't want to divorce her? To me separate get togethers is an acceptable thing given the stresses involved.

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[waverider]

Is this an ongoing theme?

Could it just be impulsive catastrophizing that will pass?

Was she party to any of the dramas that may have been developing?

[C.Stein]

I have a friend who has what some would call an odd marriage.  They do things independently of each other as well as together.  For example, he (or she) might go see a movie alone or even vacation alone.   For them this seems perfectly acceptable and it works.  Perhaps this is what you need here ... .things that you do alone and things you do together.  Outings with your family will be something you do mostly by yourself.  Do you think this is something your wife would agree to?