comp time for in-laws time

[Think About It....]

Why doesn't she want to use one of her vacation weeks?

We're still under temp agreements that don't include vacation specifications and haven't established the advance notice requirements yet. We're still in the middle of mediation/arbitration but life happens.

My temp orders - issued nearly 8 weeks after I filed -  lasted 1 year, 9 months, 3 weeks.  Vacations were listed in the county guidelines which were referenced by the order.  My ex insisted she could deny any vacation notices.  She tried to get an Amber Alert, even spoke to someone in the news media after the sheriff's staff said it didn't meet the Amber Alert criteria.  It never got settled in court, but my lawyer later said it was unclear.   Um, am I not to take my child(ren) on vacation for nearly TWO years?  Yes, I know temporary orders are supposed to be just temporary, but I had alternate weekends, maybe 15% parenting time, for nearly TWO YEARS.  We separated when our son was 3, the divorce was final when he was 6!  Sorry, that's not temporary, that's prolonged virtual torture for us parents in a high conflict divorce.

[ForeverDad]

Why doesn't she want to use one of her vacation weeks?

We're still under temp agreements that don't include vacation specifications and haven't established the advance notice requirements yet. We're still in the middle of mediation/arbitration but life happens.

My temp orders - issued nearly 8 weeks after I filed -  lasted 1 year, 9 months, 3 weeks.  Vacations were listed in the county guidelines which were referenced by the order.  My ex insisted she could deny any vacation notices.  She tried to get an Amber Alert, even spoke to someone in the news media after the sheriff's staff said it didn't meet the Amber Alert criteria.  It never got settled in court, but my lawyer later said it was unclear.   Um, am I not to take my child(ren) on vacation for nearly TWO years?  Yes, I know temporary orders are supposed to be just temporary, but I had alternate weekends, maybe 15% parenting time, for nearly TWO YEARS.  We separated when our son was 3, the divorce was final when he was 6!  Sorry, that's not temporary, that's prolonged virtual torture for us parents in a high conflict divorce.

[PDrUs]

Hi Forever,
I know, we keep trying to get to a point of seperation. We are both still living in the same house. Everytime I propose a new living arangement, she wants to change the access arrangement. This of course means we don't agree and then we end up back at the temp order because there is nothing else.

We have mediated alternating years for spring break and 2 weeks holiday time each in the summer with 60 days notice, so this is a good thing. I will get holidays with the kids. It's these "other" times that need to be settled.

I really like the concepts presented about in-law and relative time being time of the related parent and I presented this and she has verbally agreed to the kids in the concept and with the swap time. I just need to get it clerified in writing. She did respond to a text message I sent her that is in fact written confirmation of the swap time so I think I'm good and she has been ok with the swap times we had over christmas with mine coming after hers, so I am confident this will continue.

It seems to appease her NPD if she gets the swap time first, go figure. If I was to request swap time though, I'm not sure how that will go over.