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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: UnforgivenII on November 01, 2020, 03:09:44 PM



Title: Another future Is possible
Post by: UnforgivenII on November 01, 2020, 03:09:44 PM
Hello everyone.
I posted on this board 4 years ago and I was distraught, as many of you are now.
On this board I made wonderful friendships. And I met the man who is now my beloved husband.
Since then I have written a book, in my language (Italian) whose title is "Get your revenge blossoming".
This is what I want to leave you today.
Blossom.
I felt the need to come back on this board and let you know that Another future is possible.

Hang in there.


Title: Re: Another future Is possible
Post by: Cromwell on November 02, 2020, 02:50:44 AM
Thanks for the happy news Unforgiven


Title: Re: Another future Is possible
Post by: UnforgivenII on November 04, 2020, 03:10:12 PM
Thank you Cromwell. I have been short in describing my story, but everyone can go through my past posts on here and see how destroyed I was. My husband, who I met here (his nick was Claycrusher) has been a support and a friend before becoming my soulmate. All we learned through our sad experiences with Bpd helped us to build a meaningful and peaceful and stable relationship. When I went to therapy my therapist told me to write. Writing was so painful. But it helped a lot. And It became my book, that you can find here https://www.amazon.it/Vendicatevi-fiorendo-Pensieri-sopravvissuta-narcisistico/dp/8831344005/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=vendicatevi+fiorendo&qid=1604524181&sprefix=vendicatevi+fioren&sr=8-1


Title: Re: Another future Is possible
Post by: Cromwell on November 06, 2020, 11:31:14 PM
Incredible. Well done. I will buy a copy on the day when I learn Italian. :)

Thanks for inspiring and showing what is possible.
Cromwell


Title: Re: Another future Is possible
Post by: Legalalien94 on November 07, 2020, 03:36:27 PM

"Get your revenge blossoming".


This is what I use to power myself. The best revenge is being massively successful (in your own terms)


Title: Re: Another future Is possible
Post by: DiscoDave on November 08, 2020, 10:01:09 AM
Ciao UnforgivenII,

Congratulations on your recovery, your new relationship and of course your book!

My former partner was Italian, I naively put some of the 'craziness' to cultural differences, and I guess bought into the stereotype of Italians just being 'passionate'. I have come to that know this is not necessarily true, I know of other Italians who are very relaxed, reasonable and decent people!

In your research, or experience in writing the book did you find any evidence that may predispose Italians to personality disorders? I only ask inquisitively, (without meaning to criticise a whole population!) but one of my observations in spending quite a lot of time in Italy (particularly in the south) is that the influence and doting of the parents is quite extreme compared to the norms in my country, almost to the point of 'smothering' the offspring which can delay their maturation into fully independent adults. Would that be fair to say?

I hope your book gets translated into English so I can buy a copy!

Grazie mille! Auguri!


Title: Re: Another future Is possible
Post by: UnforgivenII on November 08, 2020, 09:23:08 PM
This is what I use to power myself. The best revenge is being massively successful (in your own terms)
Exactly. It Is a big revenge. Even if I prefer to call It Justice.


Title: Re: Another future Is possible
Post by: UnforgivenII on November 08, 2020, 09:26:58 PM
Ciao UnforgivenII,

Congratulations on your recovery, your new relationship and of course your book!

My former partner was Italian, I naively put some of the 'craziness' to cultural differences, and I guess bought into the stereotype of Italians just being 'passionate'. I have come to that know this is not necessarily true, I know of other Italians who are very relaxed, reasonable and decent people!

In your research, or experience in writing the book did you find any evidence that may predispose Italians to personality disorders? I only ask inquisitively, (without meaning to criticise a whole population!) but one of my observations in spending quite a lot of time in Italy (particularly in the south) is that the influence and doting of the parents is quite extreme compared to the norms in my country, almost to the point of 'smothering' the offspring which can delay their maturation into fully independent adults. Would that be fair to say?

I hope your book gets translated into English so I can buy a copy!

Grazie mille! Auguri!


Believe me, personality disorders have nothing to do with nationality. I admit that Southern Italy culture can encourage narcissism, but in the male members of the family. There Is still a lot of sexism there. But you can say the same about so many other cultures. Personality disorders are everywhere, unfortunately.