BPDFamily.com

So, I just wondered if any of the following is progress... .
It's been a fairly quiet week and I don't get on here as much as I should but it is quite draining... .like it feels like it takes a lot of effort to concentrate on a posting but I'm trying my hardest.

1.) my husband never mentioned the road rage thing but I did excuse myself from his company following it and spent afternoon with friend. This happened a week or so ago and just today he brought it up indirectly. We were going to the town and he was driving and he said... ." I've been thinking of a way I can still have fun driving without stressing you out( or something along those lines)'... .I said "oh what's that"... .he said " well when I go around the corners I can just make the noises and pretend I'm driving how I normally do" then he laughed and then I laughed... .
then we was behind someone and he said " I'm not going to get stressed that I'm not doing the speed limit... .we will just enjoy the view... ." was this a recognition on his part that his road rage is unacceptable and would anyone consider this an apology?

2.) so, 2 weeks ago our young dog was diognosed with hip dysplasia in both hips... .today was weighing day as we are trying to get her weight down.
I felt quite overwhelmed at the vets and by the time we had all got home I burst into tears... .the first time ever my husband put his hand on my shoulder... .I felt I needed some time alone so went to see a friend for a few hours.
When I arrived home he had been in bed but he got up straight away... .we continued with the rest of our day and then this evening he said... ." when you left really upset I just crawled into bed and waited for you to come back" " I need to find a way to not let other people's mood/ actions effect me in a negative way" " I think this is something group can help me with"

This must be a positive thing yes? He finds it difficult to cope when I become emotional? Which may explain why he has never been able to show me any comfort etc during difficult times?

There is something else but I cannot recall right now.
Any thoughts on these 2 things greatly appreciated.

I always say take the positive and run with it as long as you can. It's rare that we get moments of insight from our pwBPD.

As for not understanding emotions, my H says the exact same thing all the time. He gets mad at me when I am emotional (especially if I'm crying). It used to really hurt me a lot when he did this because I felt like I was being invalidated (which I was) but during one of his moments of clarity he said that he gets really nervous when I cry. For him, I represent emotional stability and when he sees me upset, he doesn't know how to respond (assuming he isn't the reason I am crying). I told him that in those moments, he just needs to ask what to do. I'll let him know. I explained that sometimes I just need him to listen, other times I need a hug, and yet other times I just need to work through it on my own. He still struggles with this, but he is getting better at asking questions.