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Title: disappointed Post by: BPDstinks on March 22, 2024, 06:00:14 AM My BPD woes are at an all time low...yesterday was my bday, not ONE peep from BPD (again, she at least texted last year) i am beginning to think NOTHING i do is EVER going to cause this "fantasy" re-connection I have in my mind. I am blessed with many people and had a great day, however, i waited all day for what I don't even know; my Jesus Take The Wheel approach isn't doing much
Title: Re: disappointed Post by: CopperLeaves on March 23, 2024, 05:00:34 AM Hi, BPDstinks, so sorry to read this. It really bites and is a hard thing to feel and share with folks around you.
A belated happy birthday to you from me and mine. Sending support. Copper x Title: Re: disappointed Post by: BPDstinks on March 23, 2024, 09:43:58 AM thank you! yes...I feel like WHEN i tell people they feel "sorry" and it is awkward OR they reflect and say "I don't know what I would do...(no, you would NOT!) well...i had (remaining! lol) family and many friends and i am most grateful for what I DO have (and trying not to dwell on what I do NOT!)
Title: Re: disappointed Post by: Sancho on March 25, 2024, 12:06:48 AM Your last sentence is well said BPDstinks. Especially when these circumstances are not just disappointing - they are heart breaking.
Your strength is holding you through it all . . . Title: Re: disappointed Post by: BPDstinks on March 27, 2024, 07:38:25 AM thank you! I kept waiting (and waiting!) still nothing (than i find out, she texted my MOTHER, (I miss you) (this all makes ZERO sense, she avoided my mother for years), i am not only disappointed, I am baffled!
Title: Re: disappointed Post by: MostlyOkay on March 27, 2024, 10:15:44 AM My heart hurts for you. Your feelings of sadness and loss are completely legitimate. I hope you'll allow yourself to sit with the sadness, and grieve the loss of the relationship you want to have.
Title: Re: disappointed Post by: BPDstinks on March 27, 2024, 01:02:05 PM thank you for your kind words...oh, believe me, I have come to terms! On BPD's birthday, I was PARALYZED with sadness; I just did not know what to DO (back story, I struggled immensely with Covid & ended up clinically depressed, I have worked VERY hard to "get it together" (about 80 percent there) and i simply refuse to back track, so...on that day, I joined a gym & returned to Weight Watchers; I would by lying if I said I do not hope one day she will just magically re-appear, but...I am very cautious. I am not mad, I have no bad feelings, I feel very sorry FOR her, however, I am not falling into the trap that I caused it! (huge steps for me!) but...this BPD is really a MESS!
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