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Title: Being on here is painful for me. Post by: misuniadziubek on July 02, 2014, 04:02:54 PM I'm not sure why I come back, but reading posts here leaves me feeling a lot of pain and wanting to cry. I'm not sure if it's because I have so much unresolved pain from the past couple of weekends with my uBPDbf or what.
I just read posts by people and it leaves me feeling hopeless. I'm happy in my relationship right now. I mean there isn't a lot of conflict going on. Things are stable. But I think I've become worn out by everything that has happened. I just want to randomly cry. I keep reassuring my uBPDbf that I love him and want to stay with him, but at some point they feel like just words strung together without meaning. I want to be with him RIGHT NOW. But I don't always see my future with him. My summary of our relationship is good, but those small moments of intense pain have worn away at my resilience. Title: Re: Being on here is painful for me. Post by: wilsonian on July 02, 2014, 04:14:27 PM I am right there with you... .came to work today in tears again... its been a rough few days... posted some things on here and read some post and lessons during my free time... .beginning of today I was thinking of jumping to undecided but now think I am going to stay where I am at... .do I feel tired.?... .YES VERY... but even through it all the times of loving and caring with my BPDw out weight the hurts and pain... I need to do a better job working on me and less worrying about her and use the tools I have better each and everyday... .so hang in there lady it will swing out of hurt... its all part of the roller coaster ride we are on in this game called love... .I have a huge heart for her and believe deeply God brought us together and we are 3 with Him... .Like I have said 100 times Corinthians 13 4-8 was in my vows when we married and I need to spend each day of our marriage going by what God has set up in the Bible about Love... .
Title: Re: Being on here is painful for me. Post by: waverider on July 03, 2014, 08:47:38 AM I'm not sure why I come back, but reading posts here leaves me feeling a lot of pain and wanting to cry. I'm not sure if it's because I have so much unresolved pain from the past couple of weekends with my uBPDbf or what. I just read posts by people and it leaves me feeling hopeless. I'm happy in my relationship right now. I mean there isn't a lot of conflict going on. Things are stable. But I think I've become worn out by everything that has happened. I just want to randomly cry. I keep reassuring my uBPDbf that I love him and want to stay with him, but at some point they feel like just words strung together without meaning. I want to be with him RIGHT NOW. But I don't always see my future with him. My summary of our relationship is good, but those small moments of intense pain have worn away at my resilience. Keep in mind that most post here only when they are doing it tough. If things are fine they dont post as much, if not at all. This can mean that what you are reading is a collection of "lowlights' Title: Re: Being on here is painful for me. Post by: joshbjoshb on July 03, 2014, 09:32:10 AM Keep in mind that most post here only when they are doing it tough. If things are fine they dont post as much, if not at all. This can mean that what you are reading is a collection of "lowlights' This can't be more true! I come back only when I feel bad. When I feel good, I don't have the need to share or to listen to others. I know, I should be nice and caring all the time... .I know I know. |