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Title: It's always a "drama" now Post by: Dontknow88 on August 23, 2016, 10:50:32 PM Everything is exaggerated, I mean everything.
All conversations end with him having a fit and or breakdown form simple topics or talking about custody arrangements. ( I mean I understand the stress talking about custody but I can't even have a civil convo with him without him literally having a breakdown and hanging up the phone or dramidically walking out so we can never have a proper conversation about an important matter" And when I do his reply is to basically wait years till he's better to talk about custody cause he claims he will win, but not to do it now. This is madness. I'm sorry for the ranting I've been doing laitl but I don't have anyone to talk to about this that kind off understands all I get is "he's insane!". I fear for our child's safety and I guess I'll be burning bridges cus I plan to take action soon for our sons safety. I just need someone that understands can relate or has an eye for solutions Title: Re: It's always a "drama" now Post by: LilMe on August 24, 2016, 07:52:01 AM I do not believe I have read your story, so please disregard anything that doesn't apply!
I know how frustrating this is! I am in a horrible court battle over my children right now. Our final court date is Sept. 19 and I am terrified! I seem to have a great case, but you just never know. You do realize that you do not have to talk to him or participate in the drama, right? He will say all kinds of crazy things (like saying he will get custody) just to make you doubt yourself. Put restrictions on your contact with him. Email or text only is the best way, then you have a record of everything. And definitely keep a detailed journal of his interactions with you and especially with your son. Document EVERYTHING - dates and times of all interactions, what was said, who was present, how they reacted, etc. Try to backdate your journal and remember everything that has happened. If the children are experiencing drama, conflict, and/or abuse, get them into counseling ASAP. I also wouldn't be talking about him to anyone except trusted friends, family, and your lawyer. If possible, do drop offs and pick ups of your son at daycare or school to limit your interaction with him. Or maybe a close relative or family friend would do drop off and pick ups for you? It is not good for any of you, especially your son, to continue the conflict and drama. I know this all really sucks and is extremely painful, but children don't ask to be born or to be in these stressful situations. You are the only one who can protect them. Keep working hard for your son! You will make it to a better place! Title: Re: It's always a "drama" now Post by: ForeverDad on August 24, 2016, 09:15:05 AM Along the lines of what LilMe wrote, it could be that it's mostly bluster from him. He probably thinks that if he rattles your cage then you'll be intimidated, weaken your newfound boundaries and retreat.
Title: Re: It's always a "drama" now Post by: Dontknow88 on August 24, 2016, 11:32:40 AM I do not believe I have read your story, so please disregard anything that doesn't apply! . I know how frustrating this is! I am in a horrible court battle over my children right now. Our final court date is Sept. 19 and I am terrified! I seem to have a great case, but you just never know. You do realize that you do not have to talk to him or participate in the drama, right? He will say all kinds of crazy things (like saying he will get custody) just to make you doubt yourself. Put restrictions on your contact with him. Email or text only is the best way, then you have a record of everything. And definitely keep a detailed journal of his interactions with you and especially with your son. Document EVERYTHING - dates and times of all interactions, what was said, who was present, how they reacted, etc. Try to backdate your journal and remember everything that has happened. If the children are experiencing drama, conflict, and/or abuse, get them into counseling ASAP. I also wouldn't be talking about him to anyone except trusted friends, family, and your lawyer. If possible, do drop offs and pick ups of your son at daycare or school to limit your interaction with him. Or maybe a close relative or family friend would do drop off and pick ups for you? It is not good for any of you, especially your son, to continue the conflict and drama. I know this all really sucks and is extremely painful, but children don't ask to be born or to be in these stressful situations. You are the only one who can protect them. Keep working hard for your son! You will make it to a better place! Thank you so much for your advice! I wish you the best and please keep me updated! I'll be praying for you Title: Re: It's always a "drama" now Post by: Dontknow88 on August 24, 2016, 11:35:43 AM Along the lines of what LilMe wrote, it could be that it's mostly bluster from him. He probably thinks that if he rattles your cage then you'll be intimidated, weaken your newfound boundaries and retreat. Thank you for the insight, it's been a crazy past couple of months |