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After reflecting for some time, I'm starting to realize and understand that for the majority of my life I've exhibited traits of ADHD. In the past I've had problems with getting things done in H.S./College/Graduate School, and now I'm noticing that it's becoming harder and harder for me to focus at work and stick to tasks. In meetings I either hyperfocus (this is good as far as I see it) or space out (this is bad), and I've always had a habit of interrupting people against my own will in conversation, mostly amongst friends. It has also been immensely difficult for me to get up in the morning, ever since I can remember. I hear that these are all common symptoms.

I'm seeing my PCP as soon as possible in regards to this, and hopefully we can work together to find a solution that works for me.

The skinny of this is that although I feel pretty healed up from my last long-term relationship with a uBPD partner, it seems that this might have had a big effect on why I behaved the way I did inside of that relationship, so much so that it could have been a major contribution to the reason why things got so bad interpersonally in that situation.

I've been guilty in the past of trying to throw all of the responsibility for failure of that relationship on my ex's shoulders. That isn't true and I don't do it anymore. But it feels like a breath of fresh air to have potentially stumbled upon a critical component of why I behave in the ways that I do in certain situations.

Just wanted to get that off of my chest. Anyone have any comments, insights, or similar experiences thus far in life?

I think having data is good. When we proceed with limited, incomplete, or wrong data, we can often make the wrong choices or keep making ineffectual ones. So it's a good thing you stumbled upon ADHD as a possibility. Defintely a good plan to talk with your physician about it!  |iiii

I was diagnosed with ADHD about 7 years ago but the dr said that I most definitely had it since childhood. My mother had to answer some questions that were on a form that the dr had me give her. I think that it may have played into the issues in my relationship with my uBPDxw although I feel that my #1 contribution to the demise was me resorting to JADE most of the time when she constantly accused me of things that I didn't do or say. That led to her thinking that I was manipulating her. Had no clue. A psychiatrist will perform a battery of tests to determine whether you have ADHD and most likely prescribe a time release medication like Vyvanse if you end up with a positive diagnosis. It is much better than the instant release like Adderall. In my opinion anyway... .one capsule per day in the morning and no constant ups and downs. Just make sure you keep it locked in a safe if your children are with you. Most of the medications prescribed for ADHD are schedule 2 narcotics.