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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: going places on May 26, 2014, 03:18:51 PM



Title: Yeah, it hurts... but it's less and less every day.
Post by: going places on May 26, 2014, 03:18:51 PM
Does it hurt to live with someone who doesn't love you?

Yes.

Does it hurt to live with someone whom you have GIVEN your everything too, AND given them all the answers on how to make things better... . only for them to do NOTHING, and look at you and say "well what do you want from me"?

Yes.

Does it hurt to be ignored?

Eff yes.

BUT

I know it's not me.

It's him.

I know it's not my fault.

It's his.

I know I did everything under the sun right.

He did nothing, or did the wrong thing because it pleased himself.

AND

One day, soon, I will no longer live with someone who doesn't love me, appreciate me, care about me.

One day, soon, I will no longer have to talk to him, text with him, nothing.

One day, soon, my home will be free from the evil, the corruption, and the darkness.

And one day very soon, I will be at peace, and good things will come my way, and I will be grateful, and I will Praise the Lord.

He cannot break my soul!

It's amazing how much I DIDN'T get done, focusing on him, and his issues.

It's amazing how much I AM getting done, focusing on healing me, and making a new life for myself and my adult children.



Title: Re: Yeah, it hurts... but it's less and less every day.
Post by: arjay on May 26, 2014, 05:04:46 PM
It's amazing how much I DIDN'T get done, focusing on him, and his issues.

That is maybe the best explanation of what a relationship with a person with BPD does to the partner.  My life was totally disorganized and everything important to me seemed to be "on the backburner".  It was like being in a constant state of uncertainty at best and grief, hostility and pain in the worst.

I didn't realize how much ENERGY I used each day just to "keep the peace" or deal with the outbursts.  It took me months to realize it too.  Suddenly I didn't have to think about her anymore and I almost didn't know what to do with my thoughts.

Peace to you



Title: Re: Yeah, it hurts... but it's less and less every day.
Post by: Banshee on May 26, 2014, 05:42:09 PM
going places