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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: Qtip on February 12, 2017, 02:07:18 PM



Title: Need help removing myself from relationship
Post by: Qtip on February 12, 2017, 02:07:18 PM
Hi
I'm pretty sure my sister has BPD.  After taking some letters that she would write to me to a therapist I was seeing, she read one of the letters and told me my sister has BOD.  My life with her has been and continues to be a living hell.  HELP!  When we were young she was much more aggressive and would go into rages and beat me up.  She has always blamed me for everything and nothing is ever her fault.  She is an alcoholic, though she stopped drinking again recently.  She is on antidepressants and anti anxiety medication which I think makes her more mellow, but the blame game is still there.  Her husband won't let her go off her medication, because she become semi psychotic.  I don't think he knows she has this, he just knows she's a bit unstable.  Any suggestions on how I can extricate myself from this insanity is much appreciated.


Title: Re: Need help removing myself from relationship
Post by: Naughty Nibbler on February 12, 2017, 03:39:29 PM

Welcome Qtip:     

Sorry you are having problems with your sister.  I have a uBPD sister myself.  She appears to fall within the high-functioning BPD label.

You can't change her, but you can make things better for you, by using certain strategy and communication skills.  Have you read any book on BPD?  I found the book, "Walking on Eggshells" helpful for me.

The links below lead to some specific information that will likely be helpful:

SETTING  BOUNDARIES (http://www.httsp://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=61684.0)

COMMUNICATIONS OVERIVEW (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=69272.0;all)

VALIDATION (https://bpdfamily.com/content/communication-skills-validation)

Are you still seeing a therapist?  Do you have to interact with her very often?  Do you live close to her?



Title: Re: Need help removing myself from relationship
Post by: P.F.Change on February 16, 2017, 11:37:54 PM
Hi, Qtip, and welcome!

BPD causes stress for the whole family. I'm sorry you are having a hard time because of your sister. What kinds of problems are you having with her at the moment? Are you on good terms with her husband, that you could discuss your concerns with him?

We have a lot of resources here that can help you learn to take care of yourself and communicate with your sister. Naughty Nibbler has pointed you to some good ones to start with. When you say you want to extricate yourself, what do you mean exactly? Is there anything specific about the situation we can help you deal with?

Wishing you peace,

PF