Print Page - Validation brings emotions down

So one of the best books I've read on BPD is "Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder" by Shari Manning. This book really helped revolutionize my relationship with my pwBPD.

She gives very practical tools that really work. Here is a video of her expounding on some of the tools.

I really like the point she made about how emotions can be like a thermometer. And that using validation skills can bring emotions down. So I tried it and it works so well. Whenever my pwBPD gets emotional I find that if i just validate his pain his emotions don't escalate. And if they do escalate I realize that I wasn't listening or i was ivalidating him. The results are that my partner and I havent had a huge destructive anxiety inducing stressful episode in a while. Hes actually apologized and admitted his wrongs several times and took responsibilify for his actions without me having to push him at all.

Validation will curtail the big episodes. And it helped me understand him more. And he's just thriving and making better decisions on his own.

So when you get a chance get the book... its on Google play too so you can read it on your phone.

And watch the video too. Take notes and study because developing validation skills improved my relationship much. I use to be all scared and anxious when my partner would get dysregulated but now I actually get a little excited because I get to use these skills and see him get some much needed peace. But most importantly I get the peace I need and we get to enjoy each other much more. It's been an interesting journey.

https://youtu.be/Pstv6FZZlQw

www.amazon.com/Someone-Borderline-Personality-Disorder-Control/dp/1593856075

BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: Bpdsupporter on April 14, 2016, 11:45:16 PM