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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: mnwushu89 on January 22, 2013, 04:41:27 AM



Title: Two Weeks "out"
Post by: mnwushu89 on January 22, 2013, 04:41:27 AM
Well my last post about me or my situation was about 2 weeks ago which was the last time I spoke with my exBPDgf. I have had no contact with her which is weird. We broke up in November towards the end of it and we had limited contact more on my end reaching out to her and vague responses from her.

Two weeks ago we spoke and she raged and already has a new savior and guy she is with chris who is a downgrade from me so I find some enjoyment out of that lol. I didn't know how to process everything that has happened. Logically I got it and understood but emotionally I did not. I started therapy with 2 different counselors one who was not a right fit and the other who I had my first appointment with today who is an awesome fit specializing in personslity disorders, relationship trauma, self identity and other things that went hand in hand with my whirlwind relationship this past year.

After our break up I started working out again and especially these past two weeks I started training in jiu jitsu and martial arts again which is my one true passion. No matter what I'm doing when I'm on the mats I escape and am zoned in on the moment. It helps a lot. I have been social again connecting with friends again and meeting new people and just living for me again. I am optimistic of the future and on the right path to recovery. I still have ups and downs emotionally but with time and the path I'm on that will subside I'm sure. If it gets really bad I read these boards for the realitu check I need of all of our stories, pain, hurt and a too common themes of our relationships. Thank you all you'll be seeing me a lot more for you all like you have been there for me and to keep you all updated


Title: Re: Two Weeks "out"
Post by: j4c on January 22, 2013, 05:09:53 AM
Sorry to hear your story. I can't help but admire how well you're doing after such a short time after your break-up! Just to get on the mat & do your jiu jitsu is fantastic! When i was discarded & painted black by my exuBPDgf i couldn't do anything exercise wise for about 5 months! And i was a 3 times a week gym goer before we broke up!

I too was 'replaced' within 5 weeks of being dumped. Its such a painful time but the more you educate yourself on BPD the more you see the patterns & predictability of these disordered people. This new 'saviour' will end up going through exactly the same as you if he chooses to stick around. You mentioned that shes downgraded which is great that you feel that way for your own self confidence etc but dont forget pwBPD simply need someone to fill that empty void rooted deep within themselves. My ex didn't/doesn't  care what her men(or women) look like as long as they're available to fulfill her needs. She has the looks of Katie Perry yet ends up with guys that look like Harold Steptoe  lol

Obviously you're gonna have your ups n down emotionally but you seem like you've got a good head on your shoulders so i predict great things for your future! Keep socialising, take care & keep us updated on your progress.


Title: Re: Two Weeks "out"
Post by: Surnia on January 22, 2013, 05:27:49 AM


I think you are one healthy path with a capable T and practicing martial arts as a passion!

|iiii