Print Page - I pray for my exBPD children

I posted on another section about my ex BPD i am posting here to shed some light and give some insight on what i seen being a fiance to a women with three kids.

She has in the past been very unstable moving from state to state place to place with her kids. She got pregnant at an early age and got married and had two more kids. She had been dating non stop for years introducing different men and women into their lives.

I've seen her smack her kids silly because they didn't clean up properly or at all. She threatened that shed want to give them up for adoption and how she was so hurt and resentful of them because her whole life has been for them.

don't get me wrong she loves them I've seen her cry when her middle child went to school for the first time but always seen her delighted when id take them to day care if they had a school day off.

but the inconsistency scared me one time her eldest was acting out in school and deservedly should of been punished talking back to the teacher and walking out the class is not good behavior for a 2nd grader at all. but the punishment was so horrible i watched her call her uncle and grand mother to talk to her this was ok i experience having to deal with a wide extended family when i gave trouble. but she persisted on smacking this little girl in the face repeatedly screaming at her until i saw blood i jumped up to stop this and all she could say was "oh she just bit her tongue".

Why didn't i stop it earlier well the first time me in my delusional state jumped in to save the daughter earlier months ago in a minor indecent. The daughter use to tell me things she wanted for Christmas or her birthday and i asked her what she wanted she told me a new doll house so i asked why when she had one. she said it was boring i told her mother in simple conversation with me in all intentions of buying her one and seeing if her mother was ok with me purchasing it for her.

but she was angry and hurt reason being she had to work hard to afford the doll house and she feeling disrespected confronted the daughter she was about to smack her and i grabbed her hand she shrugged me off and spared the child she turned to me in disgust and told me to never ever get in the way of her disciplined her child.

i took her daughter checked her mouth and told her to wash the blood away i should have called ACS but i didn't want to lose her or the kids i know weak of me.

She got mad at them really mad at them because they forgot mothers day 4 7 and 11 are the ages i forgot many mothers day growing up and my mother never mad me feel like i was a worthless child. I tried to fix the situation told the kids to go make her cards and i took us out for mothers day full body massage for mommy and picnic in the park. at first she was so hurt and mad that they forgot and didn't want there attempt because i had to tell them too.

shes beating the middle child so much even though he gives alot of trouble but he hasn't had a stable home since his birth i loved those kids. I remember her getting mad and sad because i use to spend so much money on them she felt worthless because at the time she couldn't do those things for them i had to reassure her that i just wanted to make their summer enjoyable i am not trying to take your place as there parent. She even felt bad when they only came to me to ask me for things. it was only because she was working crazy hours and i was always there for them but she felt they didn't need her or want her and how i somehow was becoming their favorite.

long story short i pray for her and the kids i loved them with all my heart now she is with a new guy and has a great job and she is happy i just hope she can do better for them.

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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: freshlySane on January 25, 2013, 07:09:33 AM