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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: lostbutpraying on February 02, 2013, 03:22:35 PM



Title: long rant but i have to get this out
Post by: lostbutpraying on February 02, 2013, 03:22:35 PM
Since when do we as nons have to constantly validate other people's feelings before our own? I'm tired of listening to how bad we are and how bad their life is. You know its not a cake walk dealing with the constant drama, rages, threats, jealousy, outbursts and inappropriate behaviour. Oh and not to mention the suicidal threats that keep us on pins and needles. I fell in love with a man that does not exist. I kept thinking "but I know the person he was at the beginning and that is the man I love". NO its not!

I cannot go through another day wondering what person I'm going to come home to. I deserve soo much better. I had a wonderful life before him and with time and a lot of work I will have that life again.

I think we always think back to the good times and hope they return but in reality it never will. Yes its a horrible illness that they didn't ask for BUT there are tools out there to help. Therapy, medications for underlying conditions, workbooks, books, websites. They chose not to get help. They chose not to try to better their lives. Well I chose to take control back and never let someone disrespect my feelings, friends, family, and my life.

Sorry I needed to get this out and this was the only spot I could think of to do it constructively.


Title: Re: long rant but i have to get this out
Post by: Rose Tiger on February 02, 2013, 07:42:58 PM
Hi Lostbutpraying,

*welcome*

Sounds like you are fed up but in a good way!  Yes, it is rare the abuser that chooses to change.  Somehow we that have taken poor behavior from others, we are the ones willing to commit to change and healthier lives.  In a very weird way that makes us the lucky ones.  We are capable of change, sadly most pwBPD are not.  I see your rant as spot on the money.   |iiii


Title: Re: long rant but i have to get this out
Post by: hithere on February 04, 2013, 02:20:46 PM
I completely agree with your post.  If it triggers you to hear about how we should bow down to the BPD's and sacrifice our happiness for them, then don't go near the staying boards