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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: daintrovert13 on February 04, 2013, 05:17:30 PM



Title: Do BPD's know how to Cherish?
Post by: daintrovert13 on February 04, 2013, 05:17:30 PM
I'm asking this question because to hop from "relationship to relationship" with out looking back.

When do you have time to cherish what you and your partner had. Especially if you take everything

you and your significant other had and carry it to the new relationship like my ex did.

My ex left me high and dry in pursuit of "happiness"... .  like a Faithful. Loyal, Respectful significant

other wasn't enough. On top of that she took everything we shared and threw it in to her new

relationship. I mean everything. I've even seen her quoting some of the things I said. It's as if

she didn't have the ability to cherish and keep anything between US sacred. 


Title: Re: Do BPD's know how to Cherish?
Post by: Newton on February 04, 2013, 05:38:01 PM
daintrovert13 you have touched on something important in our understanding of BPD and our pursuit of detachment... .  

PwBPD have a very unstable sense of self... .  they initially mirror our emotions, thoughts, desires and ambitions like an emotional chameleon... .  it is a transient existence they can sustain for a while... .  

Once we realise that we served a purpose for them... .  temporarily... .  it is simple to see how they will transfer the knowledge they have garnered from the experience of us... .  and take it to another.

Remember... .  it wasn't about us 


Title: Re: Do BPD's know how to Cherish?
Post by: susanleona on February 04, 2013, 06:12:52 PM
Yes, this is one of the things that really bothered me as well.  What I believed to be private stuff that was just between us and sort of sentimental, he used in a twisted fashion with another person or even sometimes to manufacture his fantasies.  It's like our special moments were simply ingredients in his recipes and not tied to me, I was just an experience he added to his repertoire.