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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: goodguy on February 05, 2013, 11:53:51 AM



Title: BPDex keeping tabs during her new r/s
Post by: goodguy on February 05, 2013, 11:53:51 AM
Hey all,

Is it common for BPDs to keep in contact with exes even while they are seeing someone else? BPDex and I broke up back in October after a 7 month r/s (included the usual idealization, devaluation, manipulative/controlling behaviors, mood swings, cheating, etc) Im aware of all the behaviors now and would NOT go for a recycle. However, she continues to "check in" on me via text or online chat even though she is in her new relationship. I usually just ignore the communique - but is this common for them? Is it just to keep exes on reserve in case they need them?


Title: Re: BPDex keeping tabs during her new r/s
Post by: redfeather on February 05, 2013, 11:58:09 AM
Yes it is very common. They need someone for a rainy day. 


Title: Re: BPDex keeping tabs during her new r/s
Post by: trouble11 on February 05, 2013, 12:31:27 PM
They have holes is their bucket.  I think even if they are thinking the new r/s is great and will last forever the contact with us tops off the bucket.