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Title: losing a son Post by: vasti on February 06, 2013, 05:35:51 AM Its not my place to diagnose,but BPD is the only thing that fits my DIL.It also helps me to think of this as an illness+not pure nastiness.
Over 6 years my son(in his md 20s) has become a stranger to his friends, family+country,because of his wife's alienation + antipathy towards us. Everything is terribly secret and private.I have seen him covering up,excusing + even lying about what can only be called tantrums.I feel for him having to live in virtual isolation from all he once held dear + know there is nothing I can say or do,unless he asks.On one hand, I respect and agree with his honourable attitude towards marriage,but can't understand how he survives the emotional and verbal abuse. Have come to accept this lost relationship,but am still grieving Title: Re: losing a son Post by: ambi on February 06, 2013, 06:45:49 AM Hi vasti:
*welcome* It's very hard to watch our children hurt - sometimes harder than dealing with our own pain. I'm sorry you're being kept from your son right now. There's a lot of information on here. A lot of us have been in a relationship with a BPD partner. When you ask how someone survives the emotional and verbal abuse - well, a lot of us do and fight very hard to keep that partner around. Why we stay - intermittent rewards and Stockholm Syndrome (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=70860.msg688100#msg688100) is an interesting article that talks about that very question. Do you have grandchildren from your son? ambi |