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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: Foreverhopefull on February 08, 2013, 11:32:33 AM



Title: Having a horrible day... his attitude is not helping...
Post by: Foreverhopefull on February 08, 2013, 11:32:33 AM
I know darn well that I shouldn't be asking asking more than he can give... .  but 1 phone call isn't too much... .  right?

I asked my dBPDh to please make an important call that, in no way can I make for him or can check via internet. What was his response? NO, followed by him hanging up.

Is the call important? Yes, it's in regards to his disability pension... .  which means less financial stress for us (me mostly) since he hasn't had any funds what so ever in over 1 year.

Lucky for him I'm at work and I'm already down so I don't have the energy to fight. All I feel like doing right now is hide at my mother's for the weekend and not tell him where I am.

He can't do a freaking call when I'm looking for a 2nd job so we can keep a roof over our heads and food on the table? Nice. He didn't have a freaking thing to do with the paperwork needed, all he was asked to do is make 1 lousy call.


Title: Re: Having a horrible day... his attitude is not helping...
Post by: Foreverhopefull on February 08, 2013, 11:53:36 AM
This only gets better... .  

He just called and said I was annoying him and that call wouldn't change a thing... .  

The reality is that call could make a difference with waiting a few weeks (which is about the deadline for them to respond) to pay off all outstanding payments and finally breathing a little more financially or me having to work another job to cover those expenses... .  if that job gives me over 25hrs a week with a minimum wage of 9.90$/hr.

Is a call that hard when you take this into considerations?


Title: Re: Having a horrible day... his attitude is not helping...
Post by: elemental on February 08, 2013, 11:58:45 AM
He feels it won't matter. His reality is based on his feelings.

Is it possible to call the creditors and ask for extension based on the coming payment?



Title: Re: Having a horrible day... his attitude is not helping...
Post by: briefcase on February 08, 2013, 01:04:33 PM
How frustrating.  Of course, it's hard to keep cool when things like this happen.  He's making decisions that effect you financially.   

But, try to keep centered and remember your objective here--to get that call made.  Maybe you can try using the DEARMAN technique--it's not exactly a jedi mind trick, but it is a pretty effective way to ask for something we need. Just an idea.  Good luck.


Title: Re: Having a horrible day... his attitude is not helping...
Post by: Foreverhopefull on February 08, 2013, 01:18:23 PM
I found another way to get some financial support and this will help us ALLOT. It's also an avenue that I was not aware we could take. Even the person I talked to said I should have called 1 year ago.

He knows I cannot make the call for him, he knows how it goes since he's done it a few times before.

I'm just happy that I found this place where I can contain my explosion of frustration before I meet him face to face.