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Title: one of those days Post by: freshlySane on February 28, 2013, 10:14:53 AM A lot of you guys know my story and a lot of you lived or living my story. I am better now but today is one of those day i miss her i try to remind myself how wrong she is for me and how much damage she caused in my life but for some reason i miss her I am fighting NC to stay NC she has a new guy and i new any attempt will just hurt me and justify her perception of the situation. I just one to be strong and get there days like this.
Title: Re: one of those days Post by: trevjim on February 28, 2013, 10:23:01 AM Just want to let you know you are not alone, mine too has a new boyfriends. ive had a week of work which has been great but a bit boring, so she has been on my mind a bit more than normal. i miss her too. we will get through this
Title: Re: one of those days Post by: freshlySane on February 28, 2013, 10:29:13 AM Just want to let you know you are not alone, mine too has a new boyfriends. ive had a week of work which has been great but a bit boring, so she has been on my mind a bit more than normal. i miss her too. we will get through this Thank you I am so happy and grateful i found this place. You understand you love someone and you give it your all but somehow you well me mainly i still blame myself (issue that are with me 100%) but I miss her Smile her life her voice i miss all the good times and even some of the bad times. i don't now i am crazy for even thinking this but days like this make this whole thing crappy and just plain sucky( i felt i had to use a 4 yr old vernacular to express the child like foolishness of it all) Title: Re: one of those days Post by: Discarded26 on February 28, 2013, 10:30:45 AM Just got to keep reminding yourself it's not your fault
Falling out of love with a person who wasn't even 'real'. Well that takes time Title: Re: one of those days Post by: freshlySane on February 28, 2013, 10:37:02 AM Just got to keep reminding yourself it's not your fault Falling out of love with a person who wasn't even 'real'. Well that takes time your so right and this is all about me she was everything to me but i learned that i wanted to be everything to someone (my own mirroring i guess. It burns me up inside but i want real love not one sided like what i had. I love me again but now that i am tasked with facing me this all makes me feel what is it there to love i have to face my self really tackle my issues and i reach the core i feel unlovable to me in a true sense and my expwBPD saw this and capitalized on it. Title: Re: one of those days Post by: Discarded26 on February 28, 2013, 10:41:12 AM Just got to keep reminding yourself it's not your fault Falling out of love with a person who wasn't even 'real'. Well that takes time your so right and this is all about me she was everything to me but i learned that i wanted to be everything to someone (my own mirroring i guess. It burns me up inside but i want real love not one sided like what i had. I love me again but now that i am tasked with facing me this all makes me feel what is it there to love i have to face my self really tackle my issues and i reach the core i feel unlovable to me in a true sense and my expwBPD saw this and capitalized on it. I get what your saying. In some ways that's true in all of us. We want to be loved. If I've learnt anything. I saw the red flags and I still kept going in for more. I was hooked. Now I see where I went wrong. I just need that last push to let go for good Title: Re: one of those days Post by: freshlySane on February 28, 2013, 11:08:51 AM Just got to keep reminding yourself it's not your fault Falling out of love with a person who wasn't even 'real'. Well that takes time your so right and this is all about me she was everything to me but i learned that i wanted to be everything to someone (my own mirroring i guess. It burns me up inside but i want real love not one sided like what i had. I love me again but now that i am tasked with facing me this all makes me feel what is it there to love i have to face my self really tackle my issues and i reach the core i feel unlovable to me in a true sense and my expwBPD saw this and capitalized on it. I get what your saying. In some ways that's true in all of us. We want to be loved. If I've learnt anything. I saw the red flags and I still kept going in for more. I was hooked. Now I see where I went wrong. I just need that last push to let go for good yeah i hear you i just need to be stronger and look at this as a blessing. thank you guys Title: Re: one of those days Post by: glacier_glider on February 28, 2013, 11:09:12 AM Yeah, today is one of those "one step back" days for me too.
I kind of expected it because I felt very secure yesterday, felt like I was operated more by wisdom than emotions. It was one of those "two steps forward" days. And this morning is filled with constant thoughts. I can even feel slight anxiety breaking through the influence of medications. At least I know that after a day like this there will be several much better days. Title: Re: one of those days Post by: trevjim on February 28, 2013, 11:43:23 AM Yeah, today is one of those "one step back" days for me too. I kind of expected it because I felt very secure yesterday, felt like I was operated more by wisdom than emotions. It was one of those "two steps forward" days. And this morning is filled with constant thoughts. I can even feel slight anxiety breaking through the influence of medications. At least I know that after a day like this there will be several much better days. its crazy isnt it, that you know when you have a good day, the next will be bad, its almost a pattern without fail Title: Re: one of those days Post by: glacier_glider on February 28, 2013, 11:51:40 AM its crazy isnt it, that you know when you have a good day, the next will be bad, its almost a pattern without fail I know. And the weekend is coming, which is the toughest to survive. At least I have plans for tomorrow night. Title: Re: one of those days Post by: freshlySane on February 28, 2013, 01:28:35 PM i must say music is helping me cope today im dancing singing at the top of my lungs and i must say i feel alot better not cured but im just using music to say the things i want to and can not. you guys who go through this like me try it home alone sing does not matter if your good or not it helps just sing
Title: Re: one of those days Post by: WNYIsCold on February 28, 2013, 02:20:22 PM I think it was the full moon, I also am having one of those days. I'm new to this, but for some reason today just seems like one of those days that have been horrible. Good luck to us all
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